“Kosher” lube is rabbi approved — now, observant Jews can go down-town without breaking Kosher law
It's a blessing from the Rabbinical Council...
The kosher laws of the Jewish tradition are ancient, they are sacred and they have been upheld for millennia by The Tribe. But sometimes, especially in this modern world, they can be a real buzz-kill.
Not only do they forbid meat and dairy products to be consumed in the same meal (killing sandwiches and charcuterie parties in the water) — but up until recently there haven’t been any sexual lubricants that have been considered truly “Kosher.” Leaving many of the Orthodox devout in a tricky situation.
Now though, that’s a problem of the past. Because, the lube company Wet (with the approval of a handful of enterprising Rabbi) has developed the first ever, kashrut compliant, Kosher Lube.
And it comes in eight different flavors.
(Now, I am not Jewish — for the record — so I can’t speak with any real authority about “kashrut.” But I do know a lot of people who are Jewish and I can say that none of them really tiptoe around the rules of kosher food. But, what do I know? And who do know, for that matter? My degenerate friends are the kind of people who would be sentenced to karet, back in the day. So, take that observation with a grain of salt.)
This leap forward for Jewish-kind and Kosher-tech was inspired by the great motivator of all genius innovation: personal need. The former president of Trigg Laboratories (which owns Wet) is a man named Sean Smith, who, himself is not a Jew by birth — but by marriage. He converted after betrothing an Israeli-American woman, and well… must have had the idea for Kosher lubricant shortly thereafter.
Once the official announcement of this “Kosher lube” was made, the Rabbinical Council of California dawned their frocks and fedoras and began a full-blown investigation of Wet’s new product. They followed the supply chains, visited the manufacturing facilities, held meetings, discussions and debates, researched the origins of every ingredient, consulted the Torah and eventually, they gave it the golden seal of Kosher approval.
What does it mean? How will this change things?
I will refrain from making assumptions about how kosher lube is going to change things in the bedrooms of Jewish couples all across the world. But I will point out this much: Kosher Law (as I understand it) does not prevent topical use of non-Kosher products. If it only goes on the skin (ie makeup, sunscreen, chap stick) it’s kosher, bro.
However, if you plan on consuming that product (ie swallowing it) that’s a different story. Once that non-Kosher product goes down, you’ve broken the rules.
Unless of course, that product is Wet’s Kosher lube.
But again, what do I know? That’s all speculation from a Shabbos goy (I’m looking all these terms up as I go, so don’t be impressed by my grasp of Yiddish).
The real story here, is that Trigg Labs came up with a way to tap into a so-far untapped Jewish market, so that they might boost their sales by catering to the kashrut concerned-Jew. At the same time, the Rabbinical Council is taking a small step towards accepting a more sex-positive attitude. While the official Orthodox view on oral sex is somewhat ambiguous, it seems like this a small gesture of approval — a blessing from the Rabbi’s of California, if you will.