"Now days everybody wanna talk like they got somethin' to say …"
The '90s were rad. Think about it: When you left the house, you were completely on your own. You could do anything, go anywhere and nobody cared. There was exactly one point in the night where you had to call and check in with mom and dad, but you lied about where you were about 95 percent of the time regardless.
Security cameras were few and far between, discipline barely existed and NOTHING WAS ON THE INTERNET. It'll truly go down as the last great epoch of the American teenager.
If you grew up during that time, you still know how to do a lot of productive shit, too.
You Know How To: Call Collect
That pride in knowing you just screwed over the phone company, though!
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You Know How To: Write Words w/ Numbers
*69-911-69-911-69-911
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You Know How To: Shoplift
Shit was easy back then. No cameras, lax security, huge pants. Kids these days will never know …
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You Know How To: Untangle a Wallet Chain
Can't you still hear the sound of it when you sat down in class?
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You Know How To: Alphabetize Shit
You only had seconds to find what you wanted. If you didn't, you died. Organization = Life.
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You Know How To: Rap Every Line in "Forgot About Dre"
Go on, click it, you deserve these 4 minutes …
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You Know How To: Chug Zima
We can still feel the rot-gut like it was yesterday …
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You Know How To: Sing the AOL Startup Jingle
"MOM! Did you just pick up the phone!?"
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You Know How To: Dye Hair w/ Lemon Juice
You can't remember what day it is half the time, but still know that a sunny day means smelling like lemonade with a burning scalp.
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You Know How To: Rollerblade
Your 'fruitbooter' past isn't something to be ashamed of. Er, wait, yeah it is …
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You Know How To: Explain Tribals
Then: This one represents unity and my love of Faygo.
Now: Yeah, I fucked up …
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You Know How To: Hide Weed
Honestly, you're a grown-ass man now, you shouldn't have to hide weed anymore. But if you had to … sky's the limit.
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