Denverites are projected to spend $36.2 million on OnlyFans this year, which begs the question: When was the last time you hugged someone? Hell, when was the last time WE hugged someone?
Onlyguider, which, we shit you not, is a search engine used to find OnlyFans models based on descriptors, location, and content type, recently published a study that used a whole bunch of nerd shit to project totals spent on OnlyFans across the nation for the fiscal year of 2026. On the bright side, Colorado wasn’t the state spending the most on OnlyFans, but, unfortunately, we ain’t spending the least either.
Essentially, by combining data from the total incomes of OnlyFans parent company, along with Google Ads API search demand statistics and Google forecasting models (told you, dude, nerd shit), the search engine was able to compile various projections on how much states and cities will spend on OnlyFans once the year is said and done.
We’re not going to spell out the entire survey, because we don’t need a whole bunch of bullet-listed statistics to tell you that this great country is chock-full of perverts. However, we’ll tell you California spent the most at $675 million, while places in the bible belt such as Alabama and Mississippi spent the least.
So what’s the moral of this story? OnlyFans is a billion-dollar industry, and magazine publishing in the 21st century is a fool’s game. If you need us, we’ll be getting our toes painted with French tips before our entire office goes live with some footage of our barefoot editor sitting on cakes or something. End times, indeed, but keep your eyes posted for the link.
