Why are DJ’s obsessed with food? 

Go to any DJ’s story feed and you are bound to get 50% food porn. But why are DJ’s so obsessed with food? Well first off, everyone’s gotta eat. And when you are travelling as much as some of these guys are, you are getting bombarded with new culinary experiences in every city. As soon as you touch down in a new city, there will be a promoter or club owner who can’t wait to take you to the most famous restaurant in that area because “you haven’t lived until you have had a Juicy Lucy from Matt’s Bar in Minneapolis” or “a Garbage Plate in Rochester.” Sometimes you have the best sushi of your life, other times you get Salmonella from a Chipotle in the Salt Lake Airport. The point is that your palette matures and your world view changes. This leads you to really start appreciating the foods of other cultures and regions, and realize there’s more out there than just Crown Burger. I know it seems like I’m talking about Crown Burger a lot in this month’s article but, it’s really slept on. 

 

Why are there so many “pop ups” in Colorado all of a sudden?

While sometimes it’s fun to buy a $65 ticket to Mission Ballroom, then order a $30 Uber, and enjoy a concert while sipping on a $18 White Claw, sometimes it’s even MORE fun to go to a liquor store, buy a $4 tallboy of Twisted Tea, walk on down to an abandoned Dr. Pepper factory, and wobble around to a free show with some stray dogs in a parking lot. You see, right now is the time where everyone is what economists call: “broke as fuck.” So when your favorite DJ says, “Hey everyone, meet me at Crown Burger on Colorado Blvd for a free show,” you will have hundreds and hundreds of poor wooks, who have been crushed under the extreme financial weight of Ketamine inflation and increased “cost of living.” And by that I mean ticket prices, which to wooks, is the cost of living. Now from the DJ’s side, all they see is a packed out Greek mom and pop burger joint, and they’re like, “Look how popular I am!” And then they post those videos online and other people are like, “Oh shit, I didn’t realize how popular this guy was.” They go and listen to the music to see what the hype is, and the next time they play a real Colorado venue, everyone remembers how packed out Crown Burger was and buys tickets right away. It’s a win-win for everyone. Everyone except Crown Burger. Can you imagine the little old lady working there, taking 467 special orders from a bunch of wooks who barely remember where they parked their Honda CRV. Also, why is the CRV the official most popular car of wooks? Because it definitely is. I have gotten off topic, the point is if you want a dope show for cheap you should come to Shank Aaron & Friends at Larimer Lounge on July 31st. It will have all the financial accessibility of a pop up, but with fewer stray dogs.  

Why are so many bass artists STILL moving to Denver? 

3 simple reasons: 

1: Being in the middle of the country means less connecting flights and shorter flights  in general to either coast. 

2: Shipping merch from LA can get really expensive, and when everyone’s biggest market is Denver, it’s a lot cheaper to drive 5k Waffle House parody Wooli jerseys to Red Rocks than to ship them from LA. 

3: Proximity to Crown Burger.