Each month, we set two daters up at a restaurant, give them free food and drinks, then wait for the magic to happen. This month’s Blind Date, we set Dustin and Yosefa up for a special night at Field Kitchen 111 at Gravity Brewing in Lewisville.

Meet the daters:

Dustin:  Scorpio | Builds Spacecrafts

Why are you going on a Rooster Blind Date? I’m an adventurous person.

What do you do for fun? I like flying to places, especially warm places. Beaches are my favorite. What are you best at? Facial recognition.

What do you suck at? Waking up early in the morning.

Do you sing in the shower? Yes. There is shower music.

What are you most grateful for? My smile (as he looks at his recording to flash a smile).

Do you want kids? I have two grown adults who are 18 and 21. Do I want some more? It would have to be with Shakira or someone close to that. 

Immediate red flags: Bad style.

One thing you can’t live without: Sunshine.

Why did your last relationship end:  I have this theory that within the first six seconds, a man will know if he wants to be with that person. Things weren’t working out and I had to move on.

Celebrity crush: Kat Stickler on TikTok.

Guilty pleasure: I love betting on horse racing. I saw Zenyatta win the world championship. She could run from dead last to first and win.

Yosefa: Gemini | Real Estate Investor | Airbnb Host

Why are you going on a Rooster Blind Date? To shamelessly self-promote myself. People can contact me on my Instagram @get_yosefa_snack.

What do you do for fun? I like to go to ecstatic dance, I’m an avid thrifter and like farmers markets.

What are you best at? I am best at trying new things and being resourceful.

What do you suck at? I suck at taxes. I would rather go on 100 bad dates than have to organize my finances.

Do you sing in the shower? No. I listen to true crime podcasts.

Do you want kids? Absolutely. 1.5 or 1-2.

Immediate red flags: “If you’re wearing rose colored glasses, all red flags just look like flags.”

One thing you can’t live without: Authentic connection.

Why did your last relationship end: We had different goals in life. I want children and he does not.

Celebrity crush: Michael Richards. I have a thing for authentic quirkiness.

Guilty pleasure: Iced coffee and strawberry donuts from Dunkin Donuts.

Round 1

We arrive at Field Kitchen 111 at Gravity Brewing during Space Night, which is fitting for Dustin who builds space crafts for work. Dustin arrives first and launches into how many times he’s been to Hawaii and swam with sharks. Yosefa arrives next, not having been to Hawaii or swam with sharks. Should be an interesting night. After some craft Gravity brews and tasty tots, we pull them aside to get first impressions.

How’s it going so far?

D: We have a lot of fun things to talk about. But I do with everyone. We’re talking about real estate investing. That’s really fun. A little bit about my kids and fun stuff to do in Denver, like Invisible City. It’s kind of like Meow Wolf.

Y: It’s good. He’s fun. He’s very smiley and engaging. He was encouraging me to order multiple meals.


What were your first impressions of your date?

D: She’s a hippie chick. She probably has some pot. I’m going to ask her. No, I don’t want to smoke with her!

Y: Dustin is a handsome man, and he’s very smiley. He’s got a contagious smile.


Is this the type of person you’d normally date?

D: No. Well… no. She’s kind of Colorado-typical. It’s the half a million people that have moved here in the last 5 years that all kind of look the same. I’m pretty sure everyone has met a dude who looks like me. A white dude with a beard.

Y: Looks wise yes, but he doesn’t want children, so no. He already has adult children who are in their 20s.


What’s the strangest dating story you have?

D: I don’t have a very strange dating story. I don’t attract that. I do a lot of texting beforehand to kind of vet. After a week of texting you get a feeling.

Y: I went on a date with this man when I was in Boston who showed me pornography between him and his sister. Isn’t that fucking weird???


What are you most nervous about for tonight?

D: The photography. I had to make sure everything was good to go.

Y: I’m not nervous. I’ve done a lot of things that are new to me. I put myself out there.


Did you get any advice for this date?

D: Of course not. Everybody knows that I’m a person that’s not bad-looking and a fun person to be around.

Y: Yes. When I was reviewing the questions with my girlfriend, she told me some of my answers were not appropriate and not to say them. 


How did you prepare for the date?

D: I gave my undercarriage a “Who’s your father”.

Y: I showered, and apparently took a shit ton of notes.


How did your date dress tonight?

D: Just woke up from nap time. Which is okay!

Y: Like a typical Coloradan. I prefer a man who wears a little bit more flare.

Round 2

It’s clear that things are not off to a great start. They both think their dates are too Colorado-typical, and they don’t have the nicest things to say about each other. Yosefa tries to find a silver lining while Dustin hands out his card with his instagram handle to try and get more followers. Is this real life? We slam a beer then brace ourselves for the next round of questions.

How are things going now?

D: I’m doing great. It’s really interesting. When people move to Colorado, as thousands of people do, it’s interesting about why they moved out here. She moved out here for a dude and I just got done telling her about how I dragged a girlfriend out here and then broke up. It happens to a lot of people.

Y: He’s a riot, isn’t he? It’s an entertaining date. He’s a fun smiley guy, but we ultimately have nothing in common.


What have you been talking about?

D: Previous relationships, more about real estate investing and that’s about it. Everything is getting published so I have to politician these answers.

Y: Ughh. I’ve probably said five words!  He was talking about his failed attempts at being a hunter. Oh god. I don’t want him to look bad, I’m trying to be nice. He was asking me about my dating past and how I was still single with “that dump truck of an ass.” I mean he’s not wrong. He’s very honest; he has no filter. He asked me if I did a lot of traveling. I thought he was going to ask me about my travels, but he asked me about what country I thought men were the most attractive in and that I should go to that country and sleep with a local. And then he asked me what percent chance that we’d smoke weed after the date. And I said zero. I don’t even smoke weed! Even if I did, I wouldn’t smoke with him.


Do you two have anything in common?
D: We drink beer.

Y: We both enjoy charcuterie boards. They are really good here!


What do you like about your date?

D: It’s great meeting new, interesting people from other parts of the world.

Y: There’s never a dull moment.


What do you not like about your date?
D: What doesn’t suit me is that she doesn’t have her shit figured out.

Y: Everything.


What’s the most attractive thing about your date?
D: Her dump truck! That’s what I told her. And you didn’t get a photo of that! I mean, did you see it??

Y: His smile.


How would your parents feel about the dater?

D: My mom is friends with all of my ex-girlfriends and my dad is a man. They’d think she’s cool. A cool person to do fun stuff with.

Y: Unenthusiastic.


What’s been the best part of the date so far? 

D: Free beer and food.

Y: The charcuterie board or the tater tots.


What could make the date better?

D: Multiple women. We do it like the style where I have three or four girls and I get to choose from them. It would be a lot easier. There would be one who I don’t like and boom she’s done. And then the next two or three could be potentials. I’m batting for one team, so I don’t want any other dudes involved. Just me.

Y: A different person.


How’s the chemistry on a scale of 1-10?

D: Bro. It’s low. It’s what you want to shoot in golf. One hole in golf.

Y: 0. There’s nothing worse than 0.


Where would you like the night to go from here?

D: The Dark Horse!! I don’t want to hear that they are closing soon. It’s not going to happen.

Y:  Back to my bed where I came from. Back to, as he told me, my nap.


Will there be a good night hug, kiss or an exchange of numbers?

D: Instagram, yes. We’re definitely going to follow each other. We do have some common interests. I guess I’ll hug her.

Y: I’ll give him a hug. Maybe an Instagram follow.

Round 3

Well, we haven’t seen a date this bad in awhile. As we slowly sip our drinks and stare into the abyss wondering where the algorithm went wrong, we rethink the last 10 years of blind dates. This tops the list of bad outcomes. We live, worried what tomorrow brings. We check in the next morning.

How was Gravity Brewing & Field Kitchen 111?

D: It’s good. Really liked the beer.

Y: They are awesome. I would go there again.


What happened after Rooster left?

D: I went to the Dark Horse. It was karaoke night. There are always chicks there.

Y: I went to ecstatic dance immediately after.


What was the best part of the date?

D: Answering your questions was a lot of fun.

Y: The charcuterie board! Because it was cheesy in a good way, unlike my date.


Was there a goodnight hug, kiss or exchange of numbers?

D: We exchanged Instagram accounts. And I slapped that dump truck. Who’s going to let that pass by?!

Y: No. But he did slap my ass. It seemed like something he would do and it didn’t surprise me.


Will there be a second date?

D: Hell no.

Y: No. Absolutely not.


Any advice for future Blind Daters?

D: Have a drink before you show up.

Y: Bring mace!


Anything to end with?

D: Ceasefire now!

Y: If you’re looking for the real deal and into dump trucks, slide into my DMs.

Conclusion

We haven’t had a train-wreck of a date in a long time. Ladies, if you’re looking for a man who will compliment your ass to the whole world, Dustin might be the man for you. Fellas, if you’re looking for an ecstatic dance partner who loves charcuterie, Yosefa’s DMs are open and ready for you. One thing is certain, Dustin and Yosefa will remember this forever as one of the worst first dates in their lives. Things can only go up from here.