Thanks to Drizly, Boulder and Denver's new booze delivery service, it won't be long before we're all sitting around reminiscing about "those crazy days when we had to go to the liquor store to get wasted enough to pork Sally." And boy, oh boy, do those days seem crazy once you realize that Drizly has created a world where the only thing standing between you and a handle of Apple McCormick's is the press of a button.

Thanks to Drizly, Boulder and Denver's new booze delivery service, it won't be long before we're all sitting around reminiscing about "those crazy days when we had to go to the liquor store to get wasted enough to pork Sally." And boy, oh boy, do those days seem crazy once you realize that Drizly has created a world where the only thing standing between you and a handle of Apple McCormick's is the press of a button.

After killing it in Denver and becoming wildly popular with lazy alcoholics and agorophobes, Drizly is now expanding their services to Boulder and Vail so a wider market of Coloradans can have Horintos delivered to their moist, waiting esophagi. And with the same prices as in-store liquor and quick 20-40 minute delivery times, there's no reason to ever step foot in a liquor store where someone could potentially see you buying Whipahol again.

Here's how it works:

  1. Download Drizly to your iPhone or Android phone, or log on to Drizly.com.
  2. Sign up and add your favorite beer, wine and liquor to your cart. Colt 45? Thirty rack of Tecate? A tiny, one ounce mini bottle of Courvoisier to keep on your nightstand just to remind you that you're classy despite what those truck stop hookers say? We know you so well.
  3. Check out, and pay. Don't forget to tip your delivery driver, who is very kindly fueling your alcoholism in doing this even though he has a chemical engineering degree and a toddler he needs to get home to.
  4. Burn zero calories moving. 
  5. Bring on the drunk times!

Ahh, doesn't that sound more relaxing and easy than drinking an entire bottle of wine to yourself at your office Christmas party?

Drizly first became available in Denver in July. Since then, among the nine U.S. markets Drizly currently services, Denver has become among the biggest and fastest growing. That's not surprising, we mean have you been to Colorado? We like getting drunk more than we like breathing air and not dying. Which is a ton.

“The warm reception we received during our original launch in Colorado made it very clear to us that the demand for Drizly extended beyond the city limits of Denver and we needed to answer that call,” said Nick Rellas, co-founder and CEO of Drizly. “Now, with the trip to the liquor store removed from the equation, residents and visitors of Boulder and Vail will have more time to enjoy themselves."

We'll that's just about the sweetest thing we've ever heard.

Drizly just launched in Boulder, and it will be available in Vail on November 21st, so for now, all you mountain people will have to continue mushing your sleigh dogs to the booze store until then.

And if this weren't already awesome enough, Drizly is offering free delivery on all orders through November 30, which means you'll have just enough money left over for ecstasy. We mean Excedrin. Fuck.

Now if they could just pick us up a pack of condoms and an extra-large pizza on their way, that would really help us lead the kind of sedentary, calorically exuberant lifestyle that's sure to kill us in the next 10 years, mercifully before we start getting erectile dysfunction. Yay!