One man's insatiable lust for Taco Bell has resulted in what is probably the greatest Craigslist post about Taco Bell of all time.
One man's insatiable lust for Taco Bell has resulted in what is probably the greatest Craigslist post about Taco Bell of all time.
After getting trapped in his house during an apocalyptic snowstorm in Baltimore, the man did what anyone in that situation would do: He got drunk as hell. But realizing that drinking in a snow vortex is stupid without some tacos to soak up the booze, his reptilian brain began to sing the sweet song of Taco Bell into his ear, creating a craving so virulent that he made a desperate plea on Craigslist for a Taco Bell delivery. He'd have paid a visit to the taco palace himself, but you see, he was too drunk to drive, and his car was a "douchemobile" in the snow. Logical.
Because so, so many people can relate to the consuming craving for Taco Bell while drunk, the ad went viral, making its way to the Reddit front page.
Here's that a bit bigger in case you're not a satellite or owl with superhero vision.
Guys it's snowing like a bitch outside, I've had a few drinks too many, and my sh*tty little hybrid douchemobile can't possibly make it to the neighborhood Taco Bell in this weather. I need someone with a 4 wheel drive vehicle to come pick my drunk ass up, take me to the Taco Bell drive-thru, and drive me back home. Then we can hang out and play video games if you're not a rapist. This is maybe 2 miles round trip. I'll pay in tacos. or chalupas. whatever. Seriously my desire for tacos right now is totally unmanageable, so I'd probably even buy you a 7 layer burrito if you asked nicely.
And while the poster got no love from the Craigslist community, he did what any drunk, Taco Bell-craving human would do: He took matters into his own hands. "I ended up taking myself after a bit of sobering up," he wrote. "I am currently nursing my taco baby." He ordered a "nacho loco taco, a crunchy taco, a soft taco, a chalupa, and some cinnabon bites," in case you were wondering.
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