An Alabama family burnt their house to the ground after they tried to clean up toilet paper not by picking it up, not by bunching it together and throwing it out, but by lighting it on fire. Nope, nope, nope.

An Alabama family burnt their house to the ground after they tried to clean up toilet paper not by picking it up, not by bunching it together and throwing it out, but by lighting it on fire. Nope, nope, nope.

For those of you that don't know, you can clean up literally nothing with fire, except for maybe snow.

The family's property had been TP'd by some stupid kids, and their entire lawn and house was blanketed in toilet paper. They had spent all of Monday cleaning up the mess, when suddenly, it hit them; wouldn't it just be easier burn the house down than pick up all those little bits of Charmin Ultra? Obvi.

According to Cheryl Crausewell, the lady of the house, when they finally put flame to paper, "It just popped out into a little patch and we tried to put it out and it just kept going, so I was trying to keep it from going down the front porch and [it] came down the bank and around the back of the house." Weird how when you light something on fire, it actually catches on fire.

Literally adding fuel to the fire was a propane tank in the back yard that magically also caught fire, causing flames to leap at the house, incinerating it and everything in it. Luckily, everyone inside was fine, but we can't say the same for the education system in Alabama which for some reason has neglected to demonstrate to people that they can't control where fire goes with their minds.

But they did clean up that toilet paper, so we're going to file this one under "Great Success!"