In the dead of the night on February 7th, an intense eBay bidding war for a priceless treasure ensued. After 132 bids, a flamin’ hot Cheeto that looks vaguely like the beloved gorilla, Harambe, was sold for $99,990.
The seller’s self-described “rare, one-of-a-kind item” is on par with a number of other worthless items that sold on eBay for ridiculous sums of money. These include a 10-year-old grilled cheese that bore the faint image of the Virgin Mary and sold for $28,000, clippings of Justin Beiber’s hair which sold for over $40,000, a ghost in a jar for just under $56,000, and a bag of air from Kanye West’s concert that sold for $60,000.
But the salty snack commemorating a silverback gorilla is evidently valued more than all of these precious prizes. Although the winning bidder’s purchase does not include the bag or come with any additional Cheetos, the morsel is worth more than its weight in gold. This is likely because the corn snack honors the memory of a most beloved national symbol.
The magnificent Harambe was killed after a 3-year-old boy climbed into the gorilla’s enclosure at the Cincinnati Zoo and a zoo worker shot and killed the creature. The horrible incident was caught on tape, and the footage quickly spread across the internet. Outraged by the injustice of the Harambe’s untimely death, the public lashed out. In the following days, the story was covered by countless media outlets, and the internet was unrelenting in discussing the subject.
Harambe took on a certain life after death when users on various social media platforms memorialized the gorilla in memes. Twitter tributes compared the loss of Harambe with the likes of Prince, David Bowie, and Muhammad Ali.
Harambe’s loss inspired memorials, petitions, t-shirts, songs, watches, a super PAC, NFL jerseys, and rumors that the gorilla garnered 15,000 votes in the 2016 presidential election.
The sale of a Cheeto that bears his likeness is simply just another means to mourn a great ape and an American icon. Now we can only pray that the winning bidder keeps the Harambe Cheeto in mint condition so it can someday be placed in a museum and used to teach schoolchildren about the greatest presidential nominee this nation has ever known.
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