February Hookup Horoscopes: Love at First Algorithm

February Hookup Horoscopes: Love at First Algorithm

Whether it's Jupiter's moon or fragments of a Russian missile in your third house, your sex life is going to be fire!

SexJanuary 24, 2022

ARIES:
Put your sexual prowess to use this month. Be clear on what you want before you do, though, as your fiery energy tends to make you a bit impulsive, and that can lead to sloppy sex with a partner that’ll end up giving you a nasty STD. Don’t give a whole new meaning to “The Deadliest Catch.”  

TAURUS:
You’re on the prowl for that one person you’d like to fuck silly. You’re cautioned to tame your urges until the stars tell you differently. It’s one thing to be completely fuck-struck, and a whole different vibe if you’re just looking for horizontal refreshment.  

GEMINI:
Your partners need to be able to keep up with you, especially in bed. Rather than racing like an Aries through numerous partners, slow your roll and stick with one lover for more than ten minutes. You’re one freaky fucker, so choose your pickup lines wisely. 

CANCER:
Your movie quote this month is: “Nobody puts Baby in the corner!” Speak up, speak out, say what you mean so you get what you want. If you want to try a new position, do it. Stay home and pleasure yourself? Go for it. You know where all the goods spots are after all.

LEO:
Leave your toxic exes and bad sex habits in the past because the planets are on your side. It may not be easy, but it will be ultimately more satisfying. There’s nothing better than a sexually satisfied Leo, even if you if you have to resort to phone sex or hookup apps.  

VIRGO:
If you’re considering jumping back into the dating pool, make sure your boundaries are securely in place. You love a wild romp in the bedroom as much as the next person, but you prefer to be the one in control. Perhaps it’s time for some fantasy role-playing. Try going where the night takes you. 

LIBRA:
Your favorite word this month is “naughty.” How many different ways can you use this word in your sexual fantasies? Well, if the cosmos has anything to say about it, there are hundreds, and you have them all memorized. Make sure your sex-toy cupboard is well stocked.

SCORPIO:
You may feel like staying snuggled up indoors now, but there’s no reason you can’t invite a few frisky friends over to enjoy it with you. It’s an ideal time to go buckwild because you’ll get more of what you want. Too much of a good thing is just what you need.   

SAGITTARIUS:
You love to make big plans and then go balls-to-the-wall. Before you schedule a million hookups, get more focused on what you need rather than what you want. Flirting is easy for you, and you’re going to shine. Not everyone is worthy of your sexy brilliance. 

CAPRICORN:
Don’t let all your randy horses out of the barn just yet where sex is concerned. Proceed with a bit of caution so that you don’t get in over your head. Sex is due to heat up, so savor the moments. Steamy sex is yours for the taking. 

AQUARIUS:
You’re wanting to match wits with every sexy someone you encounter this month. If you have a crush you’ve been courting, now’s the time to make your move. Avoid past dating mistakes and keep moving forward. It’s bound to be your year and sex is your BFF.

PISCES:
You’re feeling nostalgic now, but don’t go back to past lovers. There’s a reason they’re “exes.” A night out on the town followed by a raunchy night in the sack is just what you need. There’s a reason sex is therapeutic.