Welp, there you go. There's a market for everything …

Is texting that special someone a digitized garden representation of your cock just too faux pas now that the fad is somewhat over, but you still want to send them a completely random vegetable to show that you care? Now you can, with Eggplant Mail, a completely anonymous way to send a personalized dick-moji in place of a traceable and texted one. 

For right around $10 U.S. dollars, some company overseas will do the due diligence of writing your own personalized message (under 16 words, please, it's kind of cold) and send it to an unwitting recipient from a random address. 

But maybe vegetables aren't your thing? You can always go after the Tittygram, another communicative startup that proves there's truly a market for just about anything …

So that's it — that's really all there is to this post. Send people an eggplant with something written on it. Not much else to report here. Crazy time to be alive, huh?