16 times a wholesale butchering of the English language made us giggle

16 times a wholesale butchering of the English language made us giggle

VicesNovember 15, 2013

English is hard, even for seasoned English-speakers like ourselves. But that doesn't mean it's not hilarious when someone butchers it.

1. This grocery store that's doing a great job of blurring the lines between encouraging poor nutrition and suggesting a new sex move

2. When whoever wrote this got his chance to shine as a fiction writer with this melodramatic towel tale

3. This reincarnation-hostel brochure that can accomodate all of your past, present and future lives if you just let it


4. This beach sign that was clearly written by the nerdiest of nerds in Nerd Town

5. When this sign predicted exactly how we'll die with stunning accuracy

6. When this happened:

8. When this sign finally put what we've been trying to tell you all these years into words

9. When 'poop' and 'stampede' have the same connotation in someone's mind

10. When people try really, really hard to rhyme 'penis'

11. When 'Kim Possible' is used to describe how something tastes

12. Just...this

13. When our feelings for you got all red hot and someone just described them perfectly

14. When someone told us where we may and may not expire...as if!

15. When we learned we'd be getting our backs cracked by Bilbo Baggins

16. When someone set up straight about how we should be splish-splashin' around