Artist nails scrotum to the ground to protest Russian government. Your move, Miley Cyrus.

Artist nails scrotum to the ground to protest Russian government. Your move, Miley Cyrus.

CultureNovember 11, 2013

Russian conceptual artist Petr Pavlensky doesn't like Russia's police state, and he sure as hell doesn't like celebrating Police Day there. And he wanted to do something about it. Here's what he did about it:

Whoa, buddy, that's your ball-sack!

Ordinarily, this act of protest would seem like a singular act of weirdness, but this is a guy who's pulled similar stunts before; sewing his mouth shut when Pussy Riot got arrested, wrapping his body in barbed wire, you know, that kind of thing. So it seems logical that he'd eventually make his way down to his scrotum and show it the appropriate amount of wrath in the name of antigovernment sentiment. His latest sack-religious (get it) stunt is called "Nail" (so original) and has him squatting outside Lenin's Mausoleum, striking a giant nail through his sperm factory into the ground below...on case you didn't notice that in the video. Hardcore!

But let's be honest...when you're nailing your scrotum to the ground, you're not really doing anything else other than nailing your scrotum to the ground. No one's changing anything on the government level. No one's following in your footsteps, gleefully whipping out nails and hammering their manhood to anything to support the cause. Scrotum torture just isn't the best way to protest Police Day.  Now you just can't get up. Now you have to make a phone call, but oops, your phone is in your pants which are just a little more than a torso-turn away. Oops, here comes a biker who's not looking where they're going and is headed straight for your taint and oh no, suddenly you want to get up but no, your scrotum is NAILED TO THE GROUND. Oops and now everyone knows you have a tiny penis too.