Benevolent healer Nicki Minaj cures young man's sadness with her boobs
The other day in Belfast, a tween boy burst into tears after getting onstage with Nicki Minaj. It had always been his most precious dream. But even though his tears were happy tears, they activated the healing function of Nicki Minaj's boobs and she was compelled to repair the young man's sunny disposition with her ample bazongas.
Nicki, who is consistently awkward and hilarious around children, brought the weeping boy's face to her generous bosom, pressing it into her soul where the cleansing waters of her fame gently scrubbed away his despair.
Clearly, this was 12-year-old Donny's plan all along. Check out that sassy eyebrow waggle—he knew exactly what he was doing. Smooth moves, kid.
Nicki didn't blame him, though. On Instagram, she wrote, "Look at how he stopped crying wen he laid his head on dem thangz. They have real power beaming out of them that can cure the sick."
In other news, we have knee cancer so does anyone know how to reach her?