Boulder wins best college town for the 1,823th time

Boulder wins best college town for the 1,823th time

CultureAugust 14, 2014

Why do they even do annual ratings of this anymore? They should just call their list "Best College Towns That Aren't Boulder" or "You Already Know Boulder Won So What Are You Doing Here?"

It's like saying "Water wins for the #1 most vital substance for maintaining life," or "Gravity is the top-rated reason for why we don't all float up into the ethers and disintegrate."

But nonetheless, congratulations! The Best College Town accolade comes from Best College Reviews, which cited Boulder's perfect size, walkability, public transportation system, green space and Pearl Street as partial reasoning for its #1 ranking.

It also praises Boulder for its post-grad options, describing its "numerous science institutes, local artisanal movements, and tech companies" as reasoning for its continued reign. Of course, we're home to some notable employers that aren't "local artisanal cheese-jewelry wizards" too, like the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administrations, the Geological Society of America, and the Space Science Institute. We'd like to throw dispensaries, Whole Foods, the ski lift at Keystone, and Rooster in there for posterity.

Yeah. If this college town ranking was Game of Thrones, Boulder would be in the throne like 24/7. We'd have a specially-molded TempurPedic butt cushion on it because sitting there for so long makes our gluteus maximus sore.

Aside from being the best environment to pursue your Theoretical Scottish Literature degree, Boulder regularly gets voted the best outdoor town, the brainiest city, one of the top cities for artists, and the foodiest city from every publication with access to a computer. So put that in your knowledge sauce and spoon it lovingly over your knowledge spaghetti.

And now, here to congratulate you, are some celebratory gifs. You're welcome!