Cat gets caught smuggling drugs into prison

Cat gets caught smuggling drugs into prison

VicesOctober 21, 2013

As you may already know, cats currently control a significant percentage of the world's shady enterprises; transporting and delivering hair balls, being too cute, and smuggling catnip for resale on the black market.

But the recent apprehension of a Moldovan drug lord cat revealed that cats may control marijuana trade in Eastern Europe as well. The feline was caught scaling a prison fence, with the intent to distribute the two packets of pot it was smuggling on the inside of its comically large pimp-collar. Bad kitty; no treats for you.

An investigation is still underway to determine which human drug king pin the cat was working for, but we can only assume that something like this happened: After being grilled by investigators, the narc cat-turned-rat 'fessed up that he'd been sneaking through a hole in the fence to slang weed to prisoners for a while. He'd hide drugs in his collar, then strut his stuff in plain sight right into the laps of his clients, who would exchange the drugs for money and send the cat back to wherever it is drug cats go. It was so easy, man. Here's a video of the perp getting busted. Moldovan jail 1, shady underworld cat...well, he gets one point too for cuteness.

We know this is Moldova, but we still have an indescribably urge to chant USA! USA! Because, justice.