Dear Ibby, My girlfriend is super low on cash, and she recently asked me if I would be OK with her going into the escort business. Does that mean she’s not into me anymore?

Dear Ibby, My girlfriend is super low on cash, and she recently asked me if I would be OK with her going into the escort business. Does that mean she’s not into me anymore?

SexAugust 12, 2014

Not at all, it means she’s super low on cash and doesn’t have any useful, financially viable skills other slobbing on knobs to rely on for cash. Usually, you’ve gotta be in a really precarious financial situation to consider becoming an escort, so I’d err on the side of sympathy, not caution in this situation.

She obviously came to you and asked if it would be OK with you, which is a totally honest and respectable thing to do. If she wasn’t into you, she’d either not ask your opinion and just do it secretly, or she’d dump your ass. For some people, sex can be no more than a genital handshake, so don’t take the fact that she’s interested in escorting as a sign that you don’t satisfy her or she wants to be with other people. Take it as a sign she respects your opinion, wants to stay with you and wants to get paid upward of $1,000 to handcuff a rich dude to a tree and throw tomatoes at his dick.

All that being said, there are a few sexual things she could try first that are relatively safer and a less desperate than escorting. For one, she could sell her used underwear Craigslist for $50 a pop. That shit gets a surprisingly huge response. Or she could try webcamming, so at least she wouldn’t have to fuck anyone.

You could even do it together, as couples often make more than solo performers. That way, you could be a part of it, and it would be a hell of a lot more interesting than going to her best friend’s third bridal shower.
Shit, she could even go the sugar daddy route and find an older guy online to take care of her. That could still be sexually compromising, but at least it’s typically with one guy only, and the relationship usually has really clear boundaries.

If she’s set on the escort thing, don’t take it personally. If you’re fundamentally opposed to it, let her know right this second, because your boundaries deserve to be considered too. If you’re disagreeing, just encourage her to try investment banking or being the president of the United States!