Meet the women who get turned on by their boyfriends cheating

Meet the women who get turned on by their boyfriends cheating

SexNovember 30, 2018 By Lindsey Kline

Raena, 25, is what you could call a “cuck queen” — she gets turned on by her husband having sex with other women.

“A cuck queen is a girl who likes to watch her partner fuck,” Raena tells me over the phone. “She can watch, or sometimes participate, or sometimes sit out entirely.”

Cuck queening is a fetish — the less popular stepsister of its male equivalent, cuckolding. In cuckolding, it’s the man who gets ultra-aroused by his wife’s unfaithfulness. When portrayed in porn, the man is often “forced” to watch his partner get pounded by some other stud’s trouser snake. There’s an element of humiliation, the same kink that draws people to piss fetishes, wedgie fetishes, or BDSM.

But men aren’t the only sex who have a masochistic desire to watch their one-and-only cheat. As every other gender role is upended in the name of feminism, kinky women embrace cuck queening as a way to get their fetish fix of submission, humiliation, and loss of control.

Raena’s husband, Nathan, introduced her to the sexual lifestyle that included kinks like swinging (when couples swap partners), threesomes and polyamory. Nathan sat beside Raena as we talked, helping her explain how cuck queening makes their marriage thrive.

“A lot of women are fine with dates without them and intercourse outside of the home. But I prefer when Raena’s around, so I can incorporate her,” Nathan explains. He and Raena exclusively seek out other women to join them in the bedroom, which is an arrangement that Raena loves just as much as her husband.

“I want to see him with other women and I like to be with other women,” she says.

To find their unicorns (bisexual single women who are willing to have sex with an established couple), Nathan and Raena use dating apps, search the seedy corners of Reddit’s cuckqueen community, and make an effort to meet women at local sex clubs.

"We’ve gotten the most responses from our Tinder profile,” Nathan says. “The key is to start with an upfront message. We tell the women we match with, ‘I wanna see you fuck my spouse.’”

“We’ve always been really sexual people but we don’t like to label things,” Raena says. “You’re forced to fall into it because that’s what everyone calls it. I have to label myself as a cuck queen because that’s how you find other people in the community.”

Other people in the kinky community might also call what they do “cuck queening,” but that doesn’t mean they implement it in the same way as Raena and Nathan.

In an eloquent Reddit commentary entitled “Thoughts on Being a Cuckqueen Wife,” another woman explains how her unique form of cuck queening is fulfilling in its own way.

“I genuinely enjoy watching my husband enjoy sex, whether with me or with someone else…”

“I wouldn't say that the only emotion that comes up is pleasure for me. There is definitely jealousy, more so during the first year. There were many times I would feel so jealous watching him with other women especially if they were super gorgeous, that I could cry, but that is part of the excitement...”

“I also think it's important, as the guy, to make your cuckqueen wife/gf feel secure. For me, the more secure my husband makes me feel, the more I'm eager to freely explore the cuckqueen side of myself. My husband has never withheld sex from me nor has he compared me to any of the women he had fucked. In fact, he has been very inclusive by telling me all about it when it was done. Usually when he does, it gets me all excited and we have sex right after.”

From these women’s accounts, it’s clear that cuck queening is not a fetish focused solely on the pleasure of the male partner. Both men and women in a cuck queening dynamic can fulfill an intensely erotic fantasy. These arrangements are entirely consensual, and in fact, often encouraged by the female partners, due to extreme reservations men often have in response to such a strange sexual request.

Partners like Raena and Nathan are hopeful that cuck queening will begin to gain acceptance, or at least catch up in recognition to its male equivalent of cuckolding.

“Looking at your everyday porn sites, there’s a million cuckolding videos on all of them. But cuck queening seems newer. Not only the label of ‘cuck queening,’ but just women being comfortable with the idea in general,” Raena explains. “Women being gay and bisexual has become much more socially acceptable, but it still seems taboo for women to watch, or not even be involved.”

That women have to fight for the right to watch their husband screw around is a slap in the face — cuck queens believe — and not in the good, rough sex, kinky kind of way.