Wankfest: Where all you need is a free hand.

Wankfest: Where all you need is a free hand.

SexJune 22, 2013

For Leah Dufour, a 19 year old McGill student, from Montreal, partying will never be the same after she attended her first ever Masturbate-a-thon last month, where girls and guys get together and rub one out.

"I've been to countless clubs and countless dance parties," says the young woman, "but Wankfest is the only masturbation party I've been to, and it was by far the friendliest, most accepting and enjoyable event I've ever attended."

Awesome, so this is like a giant singles orgy?

Wankfest 2013 is not a sex party or a singles meetup: no harassment, no talking to people who don’t want to be talked to — floor monitors will be watching to make sure everyone feels safe.

Bummer. So this is definitely NOT a sex party. So the point is to get aroused watching eachother masturbate?

Other attendees are not there for your personal enjoyment — they are there to enjoy themselves. Please do not expect a private show, or for everyone to fit your ideal of beauty or sexual attractiveness. This is a celebration of masturbation…not a pornographic film.

What is the point again?

Masturbation parties originated in the United States in the summer of 1994, shortly after Joycelyn Elders, who was America's Surgeon General at the time, lost the support of the White House for suggesting that masturbation should be taught in Sex Ed classes. "We started throwing masturbation parties in solidarity with Joycelyn," says Phineas Hendrix, the owner of San Francisco's legendary four story Sexy Adult Fun Time Toyshop. "It's outrageous that an eminent doctor like Joycelyn lost her job just for suggesting that it was okay for teenagers to engage in normal human behaviour. Conservatives are hellbent on making people feel ashamed about their sexuality, so we decided to fight back. We wanted to let people know that masturbation isn't deviant behaviour, that it isn't bad for you, and that it doesn't make you a bad person for enjoying it."

Oh. Ok... Can someone at least jerk us off?

NO TOUCHING ANYONE ON THE MASTURBATION FLOOR — whether they have given you permission or not.

This is starting to sound kind of lame. What can we do?

if you bring a friend and you have discussed it beforehand, you are allowed to ejaculate on them as a target — but NO TOUCHING or HELPING is allowed

Wait, what? You can't get a handjob, but you can come all over someone's face? Well, in that case, sign us up. And remember, RSVP through Facebook so everyone knows your going.