Aurora Police want to be Uber sooo bad.

Aurora Police want to be Uber sooo bad. They've just instituted a revolutionary new program where you can call them, of all people, for a free ride home when you're too drunk to drive.

No word yet if they'll be following the Uber model of blasting "Birthday Sex" by Jeremih and offering you some sort of taffy, but we sure hope so.

The operation is lovingly called "Operation Choose Your Ride," a title that positively oozes with freedom and democracy … although we thought "Uber, Am I Getting Arrested Here Or Are We Just Cool Friends Now?" was a better name. 

To have had the mindblowingly awkward experience of a policeman driving you home while you drunkenly fingerbanged your bar conquest, all you had to be is 21 or older, and the owner of a phone so you could call them at 303-627-3100.

The service was only offered between 9 p.m. and 2:30 a.m. on Friday an Saturday this past weekend though, so if you've had six too many right now, you'll basically just be calling the police on yourself, sucker.

However, there were caveats: you didn't get off entirely scot-free, and the process wasn't as easy as it seems. If you wanted to ride this train of dubious police friendship, you must have shown an ID, be willing to be searched, have a computer warrant check done and sign a liability waiver prior to being allowed in a police vehicle. But … the ride was free and you got to ride in a cop car! Checks and balances, we guess.

Before receiving a ride back to the couch they've been crashing on, drunk people in police cars were also subjected to the wonderful world of DUI education. Officers also offered the opportunity to breathalyze yourself for fun and giggles … as if you didn't know your blood was already 100 percent rum-colada.

Once you were good and informed, and the APD determined you're not #5 on the FBI's Most Wanted List, officers drove you and up to one friend home if you live within ten miles of Aurora's border. We don't, so fuck you. We mean thank you, but also fuck you. Who is going out in Aurora anyway? We need this service in Denver and Boulder so badly. Anyone from APD down to pick us up on Pearl Street if we can stop by T-Bell on the way?

Naturally, like Uber, Operation Choose Your Ride was subjected to the amount of available police officers who weren't solving murders instead of hauling your drunk butt to IHOP.

We're not sure if this will become a reoccurring thing from APD, but the fact that the Christmas holiday is nigh and New Year's is right around the corner, we don't see any reason why "Protect And Serve" can't be "Drive Us Home, Please, THX."