Due to the constraints of student debt and a crushing economy, do you long for adventure yet are only able to seek it out in 48-hour long increments? Well, here’s a bang-it-out-in-a-weekend road trip itinerary for Cañon City.

 

Skyline Road

Looking for more of a pucker factor? Perhaps nothing has made us white-knuckle our steering wheel more than Skyline Road, a one way path that traverses a narrow ridge line just outside
of town.

Not only does the road offer incredible 360-degree panoramas of Cañon City and its neighboring mountains, but each side of the road has drop offs that stretch for hundreds of feet, the very sight of which can cure your hangover or make you shit your pants with a healthy dose of fear in a matter of seconds.

Perhaps most importantly, there are multiple dinosaur tracks and fossils that have been discovered in this area, and if you ask our three-year-old nephew, that’s a pretty big fucking deal.

 

Camping on Phantom Canyon Road

For the purpose of this guide, we’re going to assume that you are, as the kids put it these days, “fiscally challenged.”

Just a short drive east of Cañon City is Phantom Canyon, which is a fantastic spot for car camping, hiking, or drinking 14 beers in a row and stumbling headfirst into the campfire (not that we
would know).

If you’re someone who is doing OK for themselves and prefers to book an AirBnB for every weekend outing, well, don’t worry: home vacation websites have completely crippled the housing market in Cañon City, too.

 

Desert Reef Hot Springs

If you write a guide on Colorado road trip destinations, but you don’t include a hot spring, did you actually write a guide on road trip destinations?

Desert Reef Hot Springs is a little spa and hot spring location just south of Penrose. The bad news is that it’s mighty popular, so reservations are going to be required. The good news is that, except for Fridays from 10 a.m. to 7 p.m., the resort is clothing optional.

Maybe that’s not your thing, but the last time someone pointed out how stark white our ass cheeks were, we thought about it for months afterwards. To us, any place with some Colorado mountain sun and a chance to correct our embarrassingly Caucasian tan lines is a place worth checking out.

 

The Supermax at the Federal Correctional Complex

The Supermax outside of Florence houses America’s worst criminals (besides the ones in office, hoo-boy, are we right?) and while many may argue that it’s a dumb road trip destination, we’re a firm believer in stopping by and gawking at it for a few minutes.

Maybe you don’t want to look at the building that houses sick fucks like El Chapo and the founder of the Aryan Brotherhood, but we’re a firm believer that nothing makes the air you breathe taste even sweeter than staring down the sights of America’s booming prison industrial complex.

Indeed, nothing provides more perspective than looking at your pint glass hours later and thinking, “Maybe going back to work on Monday isn’t so bad. I’ve never bombed the Boston Marathon or sold CIA secrets to Russia, so I guess I’m actually doing OK for myself.”

 

The Royal Gorge

The Royal Gorge is a canyon outside of Cañon City that measures more than 1,000 feet deep in some areas, and if that doesn’t call for a joke about your mother’s vagina, we’re not sure what does.

Recreation and adrenaline opportunities abound, such as the Royal Rush Sky Coaster, which swings you out over the gorge faster than you can say things like “I’m too hungover to truly relish
this experience.”

If heights aren’t your thing but you’re still looking to get mega scared, you can get totally pitted in the gorge’s class four and five rapids, with multiple rafting companies offering river trips that can cater to all of your sicky gnar-gnar needs.