We can rebuild him. We have the technology. 

It's a man's worst nightmare: getting your dingus ripped off. But now, thanks to science, losing your manhood will only be a minor roadblock on the path to getting a monster robot dong.

Just look at Mohammed Abad, a Scottish dude who had the worst day ever.

When Mohammed was six, he was hit by a car and dragged down the road, which resulted in ripping. He lived, only to spend the next 18 months in and out of the hospital.

Doctors in the UK still wanted him to get nasty, so they helped build him a new yogurt slinger. 

Abad's new penis was constructed over a three-year period using his own skin grafts, and it comes with a mechanical interior that's connected to a fluid pouch. The whole thing is controlled by an on/off button located on Abad's scrotum that pumps fluid into the tube on command to produce an erection. According to his surgeons, its function is complete enough for Abad to be able to father a child with his still-intact right testicle.

We love science. In fact, penis-related science has been growing and showing recently, with lab-grown penises ready for human testing, and the first dude to recieve a cock-plant is even gonna be a dad

As you can imagine, Mohammed is psyched and already accepting girlfriend applications. 

“When you want a bit of action, you press the ‘on’ button. When you are finished you press another button. It takes seconds. Doctors have told me to keep practicing.”

Who wouldn't want that kind of consistency?