Your handy guide to not dying when you're in the floating mood.
Water sports in creeks and lakes are super chill until you realize the force of Mother Nature is capable of ending you faster than you ended that Jimmy John's last night … fat ass. That's why we've compiled this handy guide to not dying when you're in the floating mood.
The more, the merrier … except dogs
Bring as many friends as your four-door Subaru will allow — pack ‘em in so you can save the environment while your buzzed ass floats down the river. Dogs are also welcome to come hang out — just think twice before strapping your purebred lapdog into a tube and sending it ass-first down the river.
If it floats, use it
There’s no need to waste countless dollars on last-minute gas station tubes — almost anything will work. Things like air mattresses, inflatable kiddie pools or even a few strategically arranged Magnum condoms filled with air would work perfectly. Just be sure that whatever you use, you bring it home with you afterward —don’t trash the creek.
The force is strong with this creek
It may look harmless and slow moving, but that creek can quickly be turned into a monster. Always check the water levels before heading out. The last thing you want is to be cruising along just to find that the next overpass is hanging just inches above the water. Even if the weather is clear, there are still some parts of the creek that can have rapids almost year-round. Keep your head on a swivel.
Don’t let your cooler drown
No one wins when your beer swims. Put your cooler inside a normal black inner tube and inflate it, giving your booze a life-saving hoola hoop. And leave your bottled micro brews at home! The extra bottle caps and delicate glass can get a little dicey with all the bare-footed hippies running around — shoot for canned beers instead.