Everything you need to know about fingering a girl is in this weird fruit video. I'm, like, mildly aroused watching it …

People these days. They just don’t know how to finger-bang.

Most humanoids have some sort of fumbling, elemental knowledge of where the clitoris is, and at some point we’ve all caught wind of that trusty “come hither” motion that’s supposed to stimulate the G-Spot. But other than that, most of us are idiots at finger-fucking.

Science supports this idiot theory robustly. There’s a huge discrepancy in orgasm rates amongst women and men; around 60 percent of women never reach orgasm from intercourse alone, while dudes get off around 9 times out of 10, regardless of which orifice or organ they’re splaying. Furthermore, three quarters of women surveyed require clitoral accompaniment (toys, hands or tongue(s)) alongside penetration to reach orgasm (for how to do that right, see our article on the internal clit here).

Clearly, while giving a solid C+ handjob is about as complicated as learning to reload a Super Soaker, delivering a more rewarding experience for females takes a little more technique.

So, thank vaginal God that someone figured out how to school us in the best way possible: by utilizing the entire produce section of Whole Foods to represent the delicate anatomy of the female form and fingering the shit out of it. Really well, I might add. Mmm.

The guys at Simple Pickup have laid it all out there using fruits, moving pictures and small words … check it out and tell me you don’t feel a Southerly tingle.