All photographs taken by Ethan Cook at EMCook Photography

 

Intro/Possession—

 

On August 15th, The Summit Music Hall in Denver held an event that was so epic in its scope that more than one person I spoke with called it “the weirdest fucking show I’ve ever seen.” Weird or not, the fact that these words were always said with a huge grin screamed volumes; Mac Sabbath is a complete assault on the senses (in a good way). And I believe that after you finish reading this review, you will feel the exact same way—what did I just ingest?

Mac Sabbath, Tejon Street Corner Thieves, and Spaceman Bob were not only an absolutely weird combination from a musical standpoint, but they also brought something utterly unique from a visual perspective.

With that said, when it comes to this review, there’s something you should know. In the interest of full disclosure, I went to the show having been consumed by some formless entity that had entered my body a few days prior when I played the new Mac Sabbath LP backward on my turntable.

After speaking to the band about this show and learning about the amazing “Drive Thru Metal” pop-up book/LP they’d be selling at it, I got a copy. Looking at the record, I immediately thought about all the parental groups in the 80s who warned of backward messaging. Naturally, my curiosity took over and I grabbed a turntable to do the very thing they warned about.

As soon as I started turning the record, I was greeted with distorted visions of hamburger people being crushed by the “Robo-Santo” (a giant cyborg Monsanto creature), with Burger King Diamond laughing gleefully at the carnage his army was creating. I saw new, unfamiliar enemies approaching all while Mac Sabbath vocalist Ronald Osbourne was fighting them off with whatever weapon was at arm’s length. One after another, these visions kept rolling until I released my grip on the record.

When I came out of my trance I was shaken. So much so, that this concert was the first time I listened to the group since I played the album.

Though my mind would periodically jump to these images during the opening acts, I’m glad to say the show opener, Spaceman Bob, was able to completely remove them by effectively captivating my attention while on stage. In fact, I wasn’t alone as he was able to hold the undivided attention of every single person in the crowd as well.

 

Spaceman Bob—

 

In the hundreds of shows I’ve attended as a music journalist, I can honestly say that I have never seen the first band on a three-band bill work a crowd into as much of a frenzy as Spaceman Bob did. This guy is an insanely adept frontman. From the set opener “I Am Spaceman Bob” beginning with a countdown slowly ticking away on a giant screen that occupied stage right, to the last goodnights from Bob and his drummer Spaceman Chase, everyone there was totally engaged with the performance.

I have to admit that even though Bob was a bouncing ball of pure energy, with only having two members in the band, a giant video screen was a great idea. With videos ranging from indie films featuring Bob to law office infomercials to a giant hotdog pulsating to the beat, everything shown was the perfect accompaniment to the music being played.

And I absolutely loved everything Spaceman Bob was going for on a musical level. Take the hard techno of Electric Callboy (minus the guitars and hard rock/metal aspects) with some of the mainstream appeal of LMFAO and delivery/lyrics that bounce between incredibly aggressive rapping and the silliness found in some of Eminem’s work, and you’ve got Spaceman Bob. It’s quite the combination.

The inspiration for the randomness found in the lyrics comes from the fact that both Spaceman Bob and Spaceman Chase are aliens who are traveling across the universe and have decided to use music as the medium to communicate what they’ve learned on Earth.

Knowing this, it wasn’t surprising when the duo banged out a one-and-a-half minute track called “Kohl’s Cash” about how Bob has decided to use Kohl’s cash as his primary currency. Another one of my favorite songs that exemplified Bob’s understanding of the Earth’s economy was called “Costco Hot Dogs”—a song about how great of a value they are. Yet, as benign as these topics are, there were also a few songs played that showed Bob’s understanding of how dire our lives can be.

“Punch That Clock” was a standout that had more of a serious tone. With the intensity of both the beat and lyrics building throughout, it wasn’t until the crescendo at the end before a release came in the form of Bob getting everyone in the audience to punch in the air. When we all did this, the energy in the room was palpable.

My favorite song of the set was also one of the more serious tunes called “What Is The Point (Enjoy The Ride).” This song was the perfect juxtaposition—angry lyrics about the hardships of life that are spot-on coupled with an infectiously upbeat groove/tempo.

No other band but Spaceman Bob could have opened the show more perfectly.

 

Tejon Street Corner Thieves—

 

Hailing from Colorado Springs, Tejon Street Corner Thieves (TSCT) is one of those bands whose outlaw/rebellious spirit is so infectious that there’s no way you can listen to their music and not want to raise Hell.

Comprised of members Connor O’Neal on vocals and banjo, Michael Schweitzer on vocals and guitar, and Eric Owen on upright bass and vocals, their self-proclaimed style of “thrashgrass” music is one of the most appropriate pieces of advertising I’ve seen a band offer in their bio.

Musically, they play some of the hardest-edged bluegrass music you will ever hear. I know that for some, the safest and easiest comparison would be to Mumford and Sons. Yes, TSCT contains many of the elements that are found in all bluegrass music—chicken pickin’ banjo being carried by proficient guitar work and a big ass bass for the low end while a stomped bass drum/tambourine combo carries the beat—but that’s where the similarities end.

Comparing the heavier edge of TSCT to Mumford and Sons would be like comparing the raw edge of Johnny Cash to someone like Jason Aldean. In both of these cases, TSCT and Cash would kick ass and still have enough left in the tank to down a half-fifth of whiskey.

And whiskey is something TSCT knows something about.

Most of their set highlights focused on drinking and living a downtrodden life. “No Good” was an upbeat number about a man admitting to his love that he’s a drunk, ramblin’ man. “.44” was another standout, along with being my personal favorite of the night. It’s a somber affair that sounded like a much more bluesier take on a sad folk standard like “Wayfaring Stranger.” And the set-ender “Whiskey” was a rockin’ little ditty that had everyone in the crowd singing at the top of their lungs.

Much like Spaceman Bob, TSCT knew how to work a crowd. In fact, at one point, O’Neal got the crowd to start a legitimate mosh/circle pit during the song “You Rascal You.”

If you are looking for an incredible time where you can drunkenly sing along with your friends about the woes of life, then I highly recommend finding out where Tejon Street Corner Thieves are playing and load up a truck with a bunch of your friends. You won’t be disappointed.

 

Mac Sabbath—

 

Until this point, everything was fine. In fact, this was turning out to be one of the best shows I’d seen in a while. And then, the low-guttural tone of throat singing came over the PA with random words about fast food. “French fries,” “cheeseburgers” and a list of toppings, one reference after another. My head started to spin.

It was then that everything changed …

At the front of the stage was a giant red and yellow striped cloth with the Mac Sabbath logo on it that hid the stage and backdrop. At each end of this curtain were giant poles with menacing clown heads impaled on the top, each with lasers shooting out of the eyes … and each becoming the source of the throat singing in my mind. They allowed me to see a far greater truth by clearing my eyes to completely accept their message.

Then, distorted tones rang out as guitarist Slayer MacCheeze’s horn poked above the curtain like a silver bullet of knowledge. Moments later the curtain dropped, and for the next 85 minutes, I witnessed the visions that had been plaguing my head come to life before me. Thankfully, the duration of this display was accompanied by the most kick-ass apocalyptic soundtrack possible—Black Sabbath music with lyrics warning mankind of the GMO-topia we currently live in.

Once the giant cloth dropped, a backdrop of scary trees lining a pathway that was dotted by giant hamburgers appeared, setting the perfect tone for the world of Mac Sabbath. Jutting out of MacCheeze’s amp cabinet was the head of a hamburger person with chains draped all around. In the center of the stage was a giant drink cup with a microphone coming out of the straw, and next to that was a grill meant for cooking whole foods like living bats (more on that in a minute). And the drums … the drums were made out of hamburgers, buns and all.

Though I believed all of this was part of their impressive stage show I’d heard so much about, given that some of the distortions in reality from before were returning during the set, I couldn’t help but wonder if everything was a fever dream.

Joining MacCheeze on stage was vocalist Ronald Osbourne, bassist Grimalice, and drummer/vocalist The Catburglar; a group of insane(ly talented) musicians. To be honest, the only thing that was as impressive as the world Mac Sabbath painted visually was found in their musicianship. For example, “Organic Funeral” was played so astonishingly well that if you removed the visuals and put in the original vocals, you would swear to God that you were listening to Black Sabbath.

But you can NEVER replace Ronald Osbourne. To remove him would be to remove our only safety net from becoming enslaved during the great Drive Thru Metal wars; this fact became crystal clear to me during the concert. Maybe it was because I had become possessed, but it seemed like the entire history of the band was played out during the stage show. A history that illustrates why Osbourne is the greatest frontman/savior of the Drive Thru Metal world.

During “Chicken Of The Slaves,” a giant fry-like demon with massive horns protruding from its forehead ran onto the stage and spat water all over the audience. Once Osbourne intervened and showed his strength, the demon left the stage. However, in an attempt to perpetuate the battle, the fry-like demon broke one of Grimalice’s bass strings as he walked by. Though this did cause a bit of a delay, it allowed Osbourne to speak about some of the enemies he’s faced over the last decade.

Between my visions and Osbourne’s testimonies, it seems that when he went through the time dilation, a number of other (less talented) Drive Thru Metal bands were able to sneak through it as well (just like what happened in the Marvel cinematic masterpiece “Howard The Duck”).

Enemies like “Dokken Donuts,” “KFCDC,” “Great White Castle,” and “Pantera Bread”—whose song “Walk” is the “weirdest cover of Aretha Franklin” Osbourne has ever heard—came through. Another foe he mentioned was Iron Maidenny’s. However, Osbourne wanted to squash the beef between the two bands and felt the best way to do this was by playing a cover of the Maidenny’s classic, “The Grouper.”

Apparently Iron Maidenny’s wasn’t happy about the treaty as they sent out The Grouper to attack Osbourne with a giant sword. As I watched the battle unfold between a giant Viking creature with a fish head and a deranged clown, all I could think of was the quote “Is this real life?” from “David After Dentist.”

Though “Drive Thru The Void,” and the medley that included “Brand Of Doom,” “Zipping Up The Uniform,” and “N.I.B.B.L.E.” were standouts of the show (both in terms of performance and message), I feel it was during the song “Frying Pan” that Osbourne showed his true dedication to fighting GMO’s and processed foods.

This was done when he lit a frying pan on fire before placing it on the grill and throwing a live bat on it to cook. Once done, he slapped the bat between two buns and bit the head off. THIS IS THE EPITOME OF WHOLE FOODS DINING! To me, this action shows he puts his money where his mouth is.

Mac Sabbath both ended the show and my possession with the song “Pair-A-Buns.” Through the first half of the song, both the band and my delirium were growing strong. But, then it stopped as quickly as it came when Osbourne ran to the back of the stage and grabbed a giant hamburger inner tube, using it to surf the crowd. It was like watching the Jesus of mankind’s poor food choices walk on water. In that instant, the music, the concert, the visions, everything came together in a giant singularity. Then, I was fine.

With the exorcism being complete, my fists hit the air immediately (like they would at any mind-blowing rock concert) and stayed there until the last notes died out while Osbourne thanked the audience and told us how much he loved us. As they left the stage, everyone left the show with giant grins, including me. I was forever changed.

This leads to the big question: was everything I witnessed real or a fever dream? You’ll just have to check out the band on their “10 Year Anniversary Tour” when it comes to your town to find out.