The Denver Zoo called in Maury Povich to assist in revealing the father of a baby orangutan last month.
“When the Denver Zoo was unsure which orangutan – 30-year-old Berani or 16-year-old Jaya – fathered their new baby, Siska, they called in the pros,” reads an article from NBC News.
Wouldn’t that lede just be so fucked up if you didn’t know we were talking about orangutans?
Anyway, the zoo recruited Maury Povich to assist in the paternal test for the orangutans. Do you remember Maury? Remember when you’d stay home sick from school and you’d keep the Maury talk show on the return button of your remote so you could quickly switch channels in case your mom walked in on you having a sexual awakening to Kanye West’s Gold Digger music video on MTV? Yup, that’s the guy.
“When it comes to the orangutan, 4-month-old Siska, Berani, you are the father!” says Povich in a video posted by the Denver Zoo.
It’s certainly a cute idea. The last time our family tried to do a paternity test reveal, we accidentally caused a large wildland fire underneath a Florida overpass.