It’s the most wonderful time of the year again, and you know what that means… it’s time to be nice to the people you can’t stand all year! Okay, okay maybe that’s not true for you, but one thing is very true: we all are scouring the internet for the perfect gift for all the people on our naughty or nice lists. Rooster is here to help! We merrily present to you our 2023 Gift Guide.

 

DIA Blucifer Keychain
therooster.com  // $13

Everyone’s favorite creepy DIA horse is now available in a fun size keychain that brings joy —and possibly fear— to any gift-giving experience. Whether you’re giving a gift to your friend, family or co-worker, Blucifer will deliver the ultimate smile. Did we mention its eyes light up?

DOD Kinoko Mushroom Tent
backcountry.com // $599

What better way to celebrate the decriminalization of psychedelics than erecting a four person, mushroom-cap tent at your next camping adventure? Not into shrooms? No problem! The tent easily transforms into a plush mushroom from Mario Kart. The tent sports a vented ceiling, one-touch setup and a large escape exit in case you’re a fan of the former decriminalization and find yourself on the wrong side of a trip.

Toker Poker
TokerPoker.com //$12.99

Toker Poker’s 2023 holiday collection, Tinseltown Mafia, puts the “G” in gifting. Fill your stockings with members of $anta’s inner circle, and let’s get down this holiday season. 

BioLite Campstove
rei.com // $179.89

Every morning we wake up and realize there are a lot of smarter people than us in this world. Case and point is this two-in-one grill and charger allowing you the freedom to cook up a nice kabob while charging your electronics. Camping, backpacking, waiting in I-70 traffic; it doesn’t matter, the grill will satiate all your needs without the use of electricity. Pretty cool? No? You’re dead to us. 

Elite Distillate Cartridge
theclearbrands.com // $70-$75

The Clear™ Elite premium THC distillate, with over 85% cannabinoids in an all-natural Blue Raz flavor with bright, sweet tastes is as delicious as a slushie. Elevate your holiday with this award-winning flavor in The Clear 2 gram cartridge for a rich and pure taste.

 

 

Dirt Devil Slippers
$19.99 // dirtdevil.com 

Tired of having to walk over to the closet, pull out your vacuum, and clean? Ever wonder if life could get better? Wonder no more in a fresh pair of Dirt Devil slippers that clean while you anxiously pace your apartment after a long weekend of drinking. Dust baseboards or mop up wet spills with durable microfiber and chenille fabric while avoiding left behind footprints. The removable cleaning pads are machine washable and designed for use again and again. 

 

 

 

Moodmoto vehicle expression light
nimofan.com // $34.99

Don’t get a therapist, get the Moodmoto vehicle expression light! With five dynamic lighting modes, the world is your oyster when it comes to road-rage self expression. There isn’t a better way to supplement the hostile scream of telling a lane-cutter to go fuck themselves in hell than with a neon yellow, flashing middle finger. Even if they don’t see it, you can rest assured you did your best to ruin their day for ruining yours. 

DABX GO
pharaohdistro.com // $299

The DABX GO, a highlight in our holiday gift guide, blends sleek design with advanced technology. Perfect for on-the-go lifestyles, it features a spill-proof travel case, four heating profiles, magnetic components, and a no-mess reclaim tray. This portable vaporizer offers effortless operation and consistent, flavorful vapor. It’s the ideal gift fort tech enthusiasts and dab connoisseurs seeking style, convenience, and innovation in one compact package.

 

Crocs Unisex-Adult Elf Classic Clogs
amazon.com // $74.99

Every year we promise ourselves we won’t include Crocs in the gift guide… and every year, they make a shoe that’s so tacky, so hideous, we can’t help but love it. Witness the Elf Croc. Smh.

HidrateSpark PRO
hidratespark.com // $89.99

Believe it or not, water is a pretty important element in this thing called survival. For most of us, we can drink seven beers easier than we can drink one glass of water. That is until now. The HidrateSpark is the world’s smartest water bottle. Like your annoying grandma, the bottle lets you know when it’s time to rehydrate and uses an app to track your water intake so you’ll be good and moist by happy hour.