Before you encounter it in the wild, learn up. 

After 25 minutes of awkward fumbling and apologizing, if was official: I'd made it to 3rd base with a woman for the first time. I tried to mimic the videos I'd seen on the Internet, and it seemed to be working — until right at the peak of her excitement, she yanked on my hair, ripping my face away from her lady flower, and a mini-fountain of something wet erupted onto the floorboards of my Dad's pickup. That was not in any of the videos I'd seen. She laughed and said, "I do that all the time. Don't worry about it." I almost threw up. 

Ever since that first terrifying experience with female ejaculation, I've wanted to know more about what the hell happened that night. Turns out, the modern scientific community is almost as confused as I am — but recent studies have done a lot to help illuminate mysteries about the white whale that is lady cum. As it turns out, some women (10-40%) experience the involuntary emission of fluid during orgasm, ranging from 30 to 150mL. Cool, huh? Let's learn together. 

1) People have been studying it for 400 years and we're still pretty much clueless.

People have known about it since the start of time, but no one really ever thought to research it. Aristotle talked about female ejaculation. In the Tantric religion, female ejaculate is referred to as amrita, which translates to “the nectar of the Gods.” Galen of Pergamon once wrote that female ejaculate “manifestly flows from women as they experience the greatest pleasure in coitus.” Science finally gave it a whack in the 16th century, when the Dutch physician Laevinius Lemnius wrote about how a woman "draws forth the man's seed and casts her own with it." Then, in the 17th century, François Mauriceau described glands at the urethral meatus that "pour out great quantities of saline liquor during coition, which increases the heat and enjoyment of women." But since women enjoying themselves was (and to some people, still is) taboo, the scientific community didn't pay it much mind. 

2) Even in the 1980s, people thought it was a myth.

Despite hundreds of years of scientific advancement, people still really didn't have a fucking clue what was going on as recently as the Reagan administration. Psychiatrist Helen Singer Kaplan stated in '83: "Female ejaculation (as distinct from female urination during orgasm) has never been scientifically substantiated and is highly questionable, to say the least."

Some radical feminist writers like Sheila Jeffreys were also dismissive, claiming it as a figment of male fantasy: "There are examples in the sexological literature of men's sexual fantasies about lesbian sexuality. Krafft-Ebing invented a form of ejaculation for women." Oh, feminists. It's a real thing. I can promise you that. 

3) Scientists may have figured out where the hell it's coming from.

Since 2000, an increasing number of researchers have suggested the liquid may come from the Skene's glands, which are located on the anterior wall of the vagina around the lower end of the urethra. In the diagram above, you can find it somewhere just below the sticker. If you really want a lesson in gynocology, just google it. One source states that Skene's glands are capable of excreting 30–50 ml (1–2 US fl oz) in 30–50 seconds, but people still aren't sure about it. 

4) A recent study showed it was just piss, but let's not rush to judgment. 

A new French study, published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, suggests that some urine is probably involved. For the study, the researchers analyzed seven women who reported “massive fluid emission during sexual stimulation”—i.e., those who tended to really “squirt” during orgasm. First, they gave these ladies an ultrasound to see their empty bladders. Next, they left the women alone in separate rooms to "play." Once the women reported feeling sufficiently aroused, the researchers came back in and gave them a second ultrasound — which showed that their bladders had filled up. For the last part, the women were left to reach climax. When they did, the researchers collected the fluid from the subsequent squirting in plastic bags for analysis — and they also gave them one final ultrasound, which showed that their bladders had emptied again.

So it might seem like it's all urine … but since this was only seven women, it's hard to make any sweeping generalizations about everybody. 

But even if this study was 100% right (which is totally isn't), sex is gross anyway, so this news shouldn't be a deal breaker. 

5) It can be taught. Maybe. 

There are a ton of websites and self-help books out there claiming to teach ladies how to squirt, but science is still divided on whether you can really learn how to do it. Most literature recommends using something that can stimulate the "G-spot": a sensitive area typically reported to be located 2-3 inches up the front (anterior) vaginal wall between the vaginal opening and the urethra. (Named after Ernst Gräfenberg, because he found it, apparently.) But of course, even the existence of the G-spot is debated, because people are terrified of lady parts and can't agree on anything. If you really want to dig in, there's a great book available on Amazon. 

6) No matter what the hell is really happening down there, it's awesome. 

No matter what science may figure out about lady cum, it's not really important. If you (or your special lady friend) have an explosive waterfall of pleasure every time the fireworks go off, that's fantastic. Sex is weird and disgusting and incredible, so let your freak flag fly. Put down a tarp if you need to, but no woman should be ashamed of firing off a lady load when the time is right.