After potentially career-ending neck surgery, the Broncos took a chance on adding an aging Peyton Manning in 2012. That gamble has paid off pretty well, culminating in two Super Bowl appearances in the past four years. Not too shabby.

Many believe Manning’s career will end after the Super Bowl on Sunday; however, a report by ESPN claims the Rams are trying their darndest to steal ‘The Sheriff’ (as Manning’s teammates lovingly refer to him) away from us Denverites for the 2016-17 season. THOSE BASTARDS.

According to ESPN’s Adam Schefter, the Los Angeles Rams have discussed the possibility of adding the 14-time Pro Bowler if he decides to continue his career for another season. Manning is no spring chicken by any stretch; in March the former Super Bowl Champion and MVP will turn 40. He’s more of a winter chicken, but he’s our winter chicken god damn it, OURS.

Manning’s contract is itself a daunting addition on top of the liability that is adding a middle-aged man to the lineup each year. ESPN lays out the monetary conundrum:

“Manning is scheduled to count $21.5 million against the salary cap of the Denver Broncos in 2016, making it unlikely that he would return to the team with that contract. His $19 million base salary for 2016 is scheduled to become fully guaranteed on March 9, so if Manning elects to return for another year, the Broncos won't have much time to work with to agree to a new deal to keep him with the team.”

But … what about his Papa John’s empire? We know every boy has to leave his Papa and make it on his own, but the taste of mediocre pizza isn’t so sweet when it’s soaked in Papa’s tears because his 40-year-old son has left him.

And really, does Peyton even need those extra few millions? He’s already a bajillionaire. What’s a few extra stacks going to get him, like a fifth cherry red midlife crisis convertible?

More importantly, do we really need Manning anymore? The Broncos do have a budding young quarterback in Brock Osweiler waiting for his turn to take over the reins full time. In a handful of starts this season (while Manning was sidelined with some plantar fascia shit) Osweiler showed the flashes of brilliance and potential many scouts noted while watching him lead the Arizona State Sun Devils as a junior.

Regardless, to be straightforward, the Rams are desperate when it comes to stealing a quarterback, any quarterback, even one of the oldest in the league in Manning. The Rams finished 32nd in total offense in 2015 making the officially the worst team in the league in that category. Any slight uptick would be a positive, meaning even Peyton Manning existing as solid albeit a shell of his former self could surpass exceptions with a bar set so low for next season.

Personally, we just don’t see Peyton as an L.A. kinda guy. Unless he’s going there for plastic surgery to fix his permanent helmet mark, he’s too genuine and endearingly uncool to fit in. So please, Peyton, keep your forehead in the beautiful shape that it is and continue to make Coloradans proud of something other than weed. Or, just retire, because if we can’t have you, no one can. NO ONE.