As it turns out, Americans' raging addiction to soda, candy and cheeseburgers has made everyone fat. And we completely understand, because we'd love to take a few double cheesies to poundtown right now. But what we didn't know is that the people most psyched about the supreme court's recent ruling have been affected more than other folks. And a whole gang of nerds in white coats, armed with millions in taxpayer dollars, are ready to figure out exactly why. 

This study sounded completely insane — until they dropped some statistic bombs that we didn't even know:

Women of minority sexual orientation are disproportionately affected by the obesity epidemic, with nearly three-quarters of lesbians overweight or obese, compared to half of heterosexual women. In addition, heterosexual men have almost double the obesity risk as gay men. With both substantial burden and pronounced gender modification now documented, these disparities are of high public-health significance.

Holy crap! From all the lesbian documentaries we watch on the internet, we failed to notice that. Three quarters is a damn lot, and maybe this super expensive project is a good idea. 

Robert Bock, the press officer for the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development, went to bat for the project:

“Our study has high potential for public health impact not only for sexual minorities but also for heterosexuals, as we seek to uncover how processes of gender socialization may exacerbate obesity risk in both sexual minority females and heterosexual males.”

So crack this walnut, science. We want our lady-lovin' ladies out there to stay happy and healthy for a long time to come.