Facebook braggers have the least secure relationships, but try to cover it up with egregious internet PDA. Ha!
A glorious new study has revealed that the people who talk most about their relationships on Facebook are the people that have the shakiest, most unhappy relationships of all. Ha! Take that, ex and your shit engagement photos. Who took them? A toddler on a refurbished 2011 iPad? You're both fat.
Anyway, moving on. The study, which is published in the journal Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, measures the psychological mechanisms behind what's called "relationship visibility," or how public couples make their relationship on social media platforms. Relationship visibility can involve anything from posting a non-stop barrage of nauseating photos of their mundane existence, posts that recap their douchebag trip to the beach, asking friends for advice about fights they've had and just general over-sharing the trite minutia of their personal relationship with an audience who has zero fucks available to give.
Researchers found that "avoidant" personality types were less likely to post about their relationships to the social network and had a higher level of relationship satisfaction, whereas "anxious" users were way more likely to engage in relationship visibility, trying desperately to remind the good people of Facebook that yes, they're in a relationship, so in yo FACE.
From the study:
"On a daily basis, when people felt more insecure about their partner's feelings, they tended to make their relationships visible. These studies highlight the role of relationships in how people portray themselves to others."
It's a misanthrope's dream result. So the next time your ex posts something about how "Brian is so funny … he didn't wake up when I asked him what he wanted for breakfast!" take solace in the fact that their relationship is probably shittier than a Coachella Port-o-Pottie. Alternatively, if you don't want people to know your relationship is comparable to a mobile poop house, stop posting about it on Facebook. It looks exactly like a desperate cry for attention. Limit your sharing to made-up stories about Kim Jong-Un and videos of cats jumping off stuff.
And now, this … which is somewhat related to the subject at hand.