Porn makes you a better human being … who knew?

In stark contrast to the long-standing radical feminist theory that watching porn makes people view women as inferior beings and merely objects of filthy, lustful desires, a new study published in the Journal of Sex Research reveals that isn't exactly the case. People who watch porn actually view women as equals. 

We know this because, uh, we have this one friend … fuck it, we watch a bunch of porn. That's how we know …

Results of the findings were built from over 25,000 responses of people between the years of 1975 and 2011 who participated in a General Social Survey. Of the questions asked, respondents were directed to answer whether or not they had watched an "X-Rated" film in the past year (normal viewing habits?), then were asked a series of questions based on their comfort levels of women holding positions of power, working outside of the home and if they in fact identified as "feminists" — you know, real 2016 shit that surprisingly is still an issue for some older men. 

Results concluded that, in fact, more people who currently watch porn on a semi-regular basis lean towards a more equal view of men and women's standing in society, and generally are more pro-choice about abortion than not. 

"According to radical feminist theory, pornography serves to further the subordination of women by training its users, males and females alike, to view women as little more than sex objects over whom men should have complete control," the study reads. "The results of this study suggest that pornography use may not be associated with gender nonegalitarian attitudes in a manner that is consistent with radical feminist theory."

Of course, again (as is always the case with these popular Internet studies), correlation never equals causation — the findings could just be a window into shifting perceptions of both the "female" role in society and the benefits of porn. Dirty movies aren't bad and women being equal to men isn't bad either, so though it's taken a fuck-ton of time to get these two things drilled into contemporary culture, it's happening, and may not have anything to do with one another. 

It's a nice thought though, porn making you a better human being. Our old roommate Charles must be Mother fucking Teresa.