Coffee, the only substance that stops you from massacring your entire office while making you a joy to be around, has its own holiday. In honor of National Coffee Day, here are 10 random-as-hell facts about coffee, and a few of our favorite ways to add a little extra buzz to your favorite breakfast beverage. 

 

Ah, coffee: the only substance that stops you from massacring your entire office and keeps an approachable smile on your face at the same time. It's no wonder this godly nectar has its own holiday; National Coffee Day. So, in honor of this day of days, here are 10 random-as-hell facts about coffee and a few of our favorite ways to make it get you drunk.

FACT TIME

1) Coffee won’t sober you up, but it can help prevent your liver from turning on you after years of alcohol abuse. A study found that alcohol drinkers who guzzle coffee daily have a 20 percent less chance of developing cirrhosis.

2) Coffee is so full of antioxidants, it might as well be a multivitamin. It’s got B2, B5, manganese, potassium, niacin and magnesium in it. Eat shit, tea.

3) The world’s most expensive coffee, Kopi Luwak, averages at $600 a pound and is made by sifting coffee beans from the shit of a wild Civet. Yum. 

4) It would take 100 consecutive cups of coffee to kill you, so repeat after us: "I got 99 problems but dying from coffee overdose ain't one."

5) Dark roasted coffee has less caffeine than lightly roasted coffee.

6) The coffee industry makes about $30 billion dollars a year.

7) Each year Americans spend about $1,092 fueling their java habit.

8) Coffee is a stimulant, but it’s not considered addictive even though there is such thing as caffeine withdrawal, which includes headaches, depression and lethargy. 

9) One cup of coffee has more caffeine in it than a Red Bull, which clock in at 95 mg and 80 mg respectively. Red Bull vodkas are dead to us.

10) Coffee is the second most traded commodity on earth. Oil is number one. Oh that's weird … knowing you, we would have said "crabs."

MAKE IT ALCOHOLIC

Cream and sugar are for squares. Put some liquor in your java for a real skip in your step.

Irish Coffee

Cup of coffee
Shot of whiskey
Sugar and whipped cream to taste

Mexican Coffee

Cup of coffee
Shot of tequila
Shot of Kahlua
Scoop of ice cream
Sprinkle of cinnamon
 

Italian Coffee

Shot of Amaretto
Shot of Kahlua
Shot of espresso
Cream

Sambuca 

OK, this isn't technically a coffee cocktail, but it's still fun as hell. Sambuca is an anise flavored Italian spirit. It's traditionally served as a shot with three floating coffee beans that represent health, happiness and prosperity. You light the shot on fire to roast the beans, extinguish the flame and shoot that sucker back.

And, for your viewing pleasure, the most awesome coffee pot ever. It's a vacuum.