Cocaine is set to surpass oil as Colombia’s number one export, and that may sound like bad news for your friends from high school that sell used cars, but believe us, it’s actually quite the opposite. 


An article from Bloomberg explains that the production of cocaine continues to expand as the country takes a more lenient stance on narcotics, which tells us one thing: Colombia’s PR team definitely shat the bed when it comes to how they framed this story.


In the eyes of The Rooster, Colombia is taking an environmental initiative amidst climate change and waning fossil fuels. This is a huge step for the country as it steers away from automobile transportation and encourages the world’s inhabitants to instead walk (or sprint) 18 miles to their destination while they’re super hyped on cocaine.


If you ask us, this entire story is incredible news. The last time we tried to rail a line of 5W-30 conventional oil, we sure as shit didn’t have a good time.