The stress. The excitement. The anxiety. The 'American Idol' Finale might just be the biggest thing since Doritos Locos tacos. Or at least that's what one redneck couple believes when they couldn't agree on which contestant, Candice Glover or Kree Harrison should walk away with the honor of winning the coveted competition — although we all know that every American Idol winner doesn't do much more with their winning-career than sing the national anthem at the town rodeo. 

Yet, understanding that the 'American Idol' outcome was more important than life itself, Karen Harrelson, 48, and Gregory Stambaugh, 57, resorted to a knife battle in order to settle which one of them was correct about the finale. When cops arrived at the residence, Harrelson and Stambaugh were standing on the porch, bleeding and still arguing. It appears a knife wound can't persuade a drunken idiot when it comes to a singing competition. 

According to the affidavit obtained by CBS 21, Stambaugh told authorities that Harrelson started drinking at 5 a.m., "and was drinking beer and a lot of tequila throughout the day." He, on the other hand, claims he did not start drinking until noon and that he "was drinking beer and had a pint of Scotch."

She started drinking tequila at 5 a.m.? He didn't start until noon? First, she sounds like our kind of woman. Second, when your accomplishment of the day — and defense for stabbing someone — is that you didn't start drinking until noon, then you might want to re-examine your life goals.

As much as we love tequila, in the case of scotch at noon vs. tequila at 5a.m., scotch trumps tequila. Court adjourned.