Is that a vape pen in your pocket or are you just happy to be able to buy an e-cig with Viagra in it?

HelloCig slipped the active ingredients in Viagra and Cialis into the normal mix of nicotine and vape juice, the FDA said.

Could this have been a mistake? Some residue of dick pills floating around the factory?

Nope. One of the products was called E-Cialis.

Users knew something was up when their work smoke breaks ended in maternity leave, we believe.

The E-Cialis HelloCig E-Liquid for vape pens had sildenafil and tadalafil, the active ingredients in Viagra and Cialis, respectively.

HelloCig knew what they were doing. Here's the ad for the pens — very Big Pharma. Emphasis on Big.

The FDA noted that, aside from being a weird way to get a stiffy, sildenafil "can be associated with significant safety issues and the risk of serious adverse events. For example, they may interact with nitrates found in some prescription drugs used to treat, high blood pressure or heart disease, and can lower blood pressure to dangerous levels.”

China makes a fortune selling sildenafil under the table. Half of those dick pills you buy at the gas station with names like Vegas Style Triple Maximum Premium and the Royal Master are just expired sildenafil mixed in with fillers. 

HelloCig has 15 days to respond to the FDA's charges.

Regular, non-dick-hardening E-cigs have already been called a scourge, a plague, and every other nasty name by the FDA. The head punjab over there, Scott Gottlieb, declared not long ago that e-cigarette use among teenagers has “reached nothing short of an epidemic proportion of growth.”

“I use the word epidemic with great care,” he wrote. “E-cigs have become an almost ubiquitous—and dangerous—trend among teens. … The resulting path to addiction must end. … The FDA won’t tolerate a whole generation of young people becoming addicted to nicotine."

Vape juice for dong levitation is surely just one more reason to inhale.

We'll just stick to vape pens with DMT in them, thank you very much. Pretty sure nothing can go wrong with that.