St. Patrick's Day is one of our favorite holidays. Why, you ask? Because, it's entirely acceptable to start drinking as soon as the sun comes up, and when it lands on a Monday we get to party all weekend. But we know you've got more important things to do than design your drunk-ass drink menu, so we did it for you. We shrunk our favorite St. Patty's drinks into shot versions because you know what they say, smaller is better (maybe not according to our girlfriends). That, or we have too much time on our hands.

St. Patrick's Day is one of our favorite holidays. Why, you ask? Because, it's entirely acceptable to start drinking as soon as the sun comes up, and when it lands on a Monday we get to party all weekend. But we know you've got more important things to do than design your drunk-ass drink menu, so we did it for you. We shrunk our favorite St. Patty's drinks into shot versions because you know what they say, smaller is better (maybe not according to our girlfriends). That, or we have too much time on our hands.

Mini Guinness

St. Patty's Day isn't the same unless you have yourself a Guinness at the some point during the festitivites. For those who can't handle a thick beer and instead perfer a decadently flavorful and unexpectedly harmonious pairing, the mini Guiness is for you. Smooth and balanced, the mini Guinness compliments any party or bad decision.

You need:

  • 1 oz. Patron XO Cafe
  • 0.5 oz. Bailey's Irish Cream

Mini Beer

Addiction comes in many shapes and forms. Mini beers are a form of diabolically deilcious addiction that leave you helplessly craving more. Simply float Irish cream on top of the Spanish liquor using a spoon or knife, then step back to enjoy it's miniature delicacy. The cream cuts the sweetness, leaving a light-coating on your refined, yet drunk palate.

You need:

  • 1 oz. Licor 43
  • 0.5 oz. heavy cream

Guinness Jello Shot

Grab the holiday celebrations by the horns by mixing gelatin and Guinness together in a bowl. Next, boil water and add it to the mixture, The sweeter the shot, the less water you need. Refrigerate to harden. For the foam head, boil gelatin and water, then mix it with Irish cream. Pour the cream over the top of the hard Guinness shots and refrigerate! Viola! You're like an alcoholic Martha Stewart.

You need:

  • Guinness
  • Bailey's Irish Cream
  • 2 gelatin packets

Just a Straight Shot of Jameson Whiskey

You're not one for getting caught up in the hype. You cringe at the thought of more than one ingredient in a drink. Frozen? No. Fruity? Never. Green was never your color anyway. But you'll placate. All you want and need is something simple, smooth and succulent to satisfy your St. Paddy's day cravings. And so you turn to whiskey. It's tried. It's true. It's you.

You need:

  • Don't make us tell you what you need, you're a grown-ass adult.

 

Alright, alright, now that you've got the recipes cued up, we thought we'd show you what they'll do to you if you don't hydrate with all the Irish spring water you can find:

Have a happy drunk this weekend, you guys. Love, Rooster.