Jack of all trades David Babcock is actually just a Jack of one really stupid trade: knitting while running. Sweet, because you never know if someday you'll need to knit your niece a sweater for her quinceañera while running from a bear.

The Missouri graphic design professor is so good at it in fact, that he recently won himself a place in the Guinness Book of World Records by setting the record for the longest scarf ever knitted while running a marathon. Know how long the scarf was? Twelve feet. What the fuck was he going to do with a 12 foot scarf? Put it on an airplane to keep it warm?

David began the idiotic activity of knitting while running three years ago, when he decided to combine both hobbies because they were both "boring."

"It took a long time to do distance running. It takes a long time to do knitting. I thought these could go together. They are both kind of tedious,"he told KCTV. You know what else is tedious? Surgically removing a knitting needle that has impaled your knee following a marathon accident. 

This is definitely the dumbest world record to ever be set, which make us think…if this guy can do it, we're pretty sure we, and you, could do it. But we're too tired, we'll do it next week.