So you can celebrate in solemn earnest and face-stuffing.

We polled our friends and readers about their favorite Colorado pies. And let us tell you … the results are derisive.

It's almost impossible to pick the best pizza in this state, partly because pizza restaurants are the most common restaurant, and partly because Colorado just has really good food. So to quiet the rabid pizza diehards, the restaurants we've listed here are simply some of ours, and our reader's, favorites.

The people have spoken, and here is what they've said (in no particular order) …

1. Sexy Pizza

Multiple locations in Denver.

Apart from serving up New York-ish style pizza so good it could make blind man see, Sexy Pizza is involved in all sorts of philanthropic community events and charities, which does make you feel pretty sexy. They also have a lot of less philanthropic fun-times like comedy nights for you too if you hate giving and love eating (same).

2. Cosmo's

Multiple locations in Denver and Boulder.

Drunk pizza is drunk pizza, but Cosmo's does inebriated Italian better than anyone else with their schnauzer-sized slices and physically addictive spicy ranch.

3. Pizzeria Locale

One in Boulder, one in Denver.

Ultra-traditional Neapolitan-style pizza is the name of the game at Pizzeria Locale, Colorado's finest hoitey-toitey pizzeria. They're so immovably committed to making you feel like you're in a seaside Italian village that they serve their personal-sized pizzas un-sliced alongside a baller wine selection and some pinkies-out salads and appetizers.

4. Boss Lady Pizza

Boulder.

When it comes to topping their pizzas, we're pretty sure Boss Lady uses some sort of lottery system in which they select random ingredients out of a hat and just … throw it on there. Fortunately for us with taste buds, that method works like a charm. So if you prescribe to the unconventional notion that "pizza" just means anything on top of a bread circle, BLP is for you.

Need proof? The Frankenstein-esque Pizza Fry pizza, featuring waffle fries, dollops of marinara, pepperoni, mozzarella, and fresh garlic topped with Parmesan cheese and BLP seasoning … the fuck?

5. Fat Sully's

Multiple locations in Denver.

Fat Sully's walk-up window is a game-changer for anyone on South Broadway in Denver whose stomach haunts the night. Open until 4 a.m., their giant New York slices are complete life savers when nothing else is open and Denver becomes a silent wasteland cloaked in night. However … they're just dandy as a satisfying, ultra-cheap lunch or dinner option for those with less-than-vampiric waking hours. Oh, and the garlic tastes very garlicky. Applause. They've got a food truck and another location inside the Denver Biscuit Company, too.

6. Beau Jo's

Boulder.

Ahh, we've finally reached the deep dish portion of this list. Beau Jo's isn't so much "deep dish" in the Chicago sense (in fact, they're Colorado-style, in a category of their own), but their pizza's crust is one hell of a lot thicker than most of the pizza you'll find in these parts, so for our purposes, we're anointing them "Fattest of Them All." Legends have been told and passed down throughout history about their honey and whole wheat crust.

7. Famous Pizza

Denver.

We don't know how they get their pizza to be so cheap and quick, yet so un-greasy, but somehow Famous Pizza has managed to create a thoroughly un-oily budget experience which always makes our stomachs, and our looming credit card debt, feel pretty good.

8. Fargo's Pizza

Colorado Springs (!!).

Colorado Springs: we literally never write about you, but right now, this very moment marks probably the first time in history that we are. This is your time to shine, and you have Fargo's Pizza, with their weird, disembodied animal head decor and ghost pianos to blame. Eating your delicious pie while simultaneously pondering life after death is exactly the kind of atmosphere we're missing in Colorado's better-known locales, and pizza tastes all the better when you're in a highly stylized Wild West movie set.

9. City O' City

Denver.

This place is a total nightmare for meat eaters, but for the vegans and vegetarians amongst us, it's the best thing that ever happened. No one does cashew cheese like City O' City, and their firm and utter resistance to disgusting Daiya cheese warms our hearts. Even the most rabid cheese-heads might not miss it on City O's pies; the toppings (olive tapenade, buffalo ranch sauce, etc.) render all dairy products obsolete.

10. Hops & Pie

Denver.

The pizza at Hops & Pie could stand on its own any day, but their rotating selection of craft beers elevates this spot into a realm of infamy only inhabitated by those who can find the perfect marriage between yeasty beer and yeasty pizza crust. We never thought we'd say this, but yeast on yeast tastes pretty fucking glorious, and it doesn't hurt that both their pizza and beer feature creative, unexpected flavor combinations that border on fancy but never cross that line.

11. Pizza Casbah

Fort Collins.

Pizza Casbah has a pizza challenge in which they give you an hour to eat a 30-inch, 12 pound pizza. And while it's nice that they have that option for people who are really hungry (times a factor of a million), they've also got the lighter eater covered with a selection of requestite New York style slices. We'd dare say they're the Cosmo's of Fort Collins just for the sake of comparison, but they're good enough to stand on their own.

Other honorable mentions so you guys don't rip our heads off: Cart-Driver, Osteria Marco, The Garlic Knot, Two-Fisted Marios, Anthony's, Brava! Pizza, Kaos, Lucky Pie, Marco's Coal Fired Pizza, Pie Hole and … we never thought we'd say this but … Blackjack. There, we said it.