If you think your problems are burdensome and overwhelming, listen to the story of one Daniel Metzgar, a 44-year-old truck driver from Newark, NJ. Following his 2009 penile implant surgery, Metzgar noticed that not all was well with his twig and berries. For eight months, Metzgar walked around with a rock-hard erection and a scrotum the size of a volleyball. How he managed to go eight months without suspecting it might be time to go back to the doctor boggles us but either way, he's finally living the American dream and suing the doctor.
Metzgar claims the doctor ignored all signs of a complication with the surgery as well as the impending medical challenges. But more importantly, Metzgar focused on the true handicap of having an eight-month erection,
'I could hardly dance, with an erection poking my partner,' he said in the Dailymail.
We understand. We were once middle schoolers. It's important to note that Metzgar could 'hardly dance'. Meaning he could still dance, just not to the level he's become accustomed to. According to Metzgar's lawyer, the erection affected more than just his ability to bust a move. Everyday tasks such as riding on his motorbike or collecting his newspaper – became a problem for Mr Metzgar as he was 'stuck in this position'. He also felt that the prosthetic made him less of a man. And in essence, having a fake penis kind of does.
On another note, Metzgar's marriage has never been better and his wife's glow in undeniable.