Passengers on a commercial flight from Portugal to Ireland were pretty surprised when a 25-year-old man got out his seat and bit someone. It sounds just like a scene from that horrible Brad Pitt zombie movie but with less-blatant product placement and a more believable plot.
Cures himself of zombie virus, immediately drinks can of cancer.
The man, John Kennedy Santos Gurjao, was reportedly acting panicked during the flight and got out of his seat, when another passenger tried to restrain him, Gurjao fought back and bit the man on the arm. After that, Gurjao began having a seizure and fell to the floor.
As you might imagine, the passengers were a little freaked out, and when the news broke to the Internet, people thought it was the end of the damn world. Unfortunately for all the Walking Dead fanatics out there, Gurjao wasn’t a zombie, he was just reacting to the 1.76 pounds of cocaine that he swallowed earlier.
You see, unless he was tricked in eating them, Gurjao had voluntarily ingested 80 individual bundles of cocaine. Which is a number that would even make Tony Montana think twice. And if swallowing 80 bundles of cocaine doesn’t sound like dedication, just imagine what it would have been like trying to squeeze those bad boys out. Unfortunately for Gurjao, it only took one of those packets popping in his stomach to teach him the un-pleasant side effects of cocaine smuggling.
Possible side effects include: increased self-esteem, desire to sing Wu-Tang lyrics and death.
The seizure he endured was a result of a cocaine overdose. Two nurses and a doctor onboard the flight tried to save Gurjao’s life but there was nothing they could do. A woman who was believed to be traveling with Grujao was arrested after police found four pounds of amphetamines in her bag, which was a slightly smarter plan than swallowing it, but still really really stupid.