A new, pure THC product with mood enhancers promises to open up recreational cannabis to more users.

So your dad goes and visits a dispensary.

He rolls back to the house with a pre-rolled joint — like the ones he used to see at concerts in college — and lights up in the basement.

An hour later, the old man has devoured a bag of Doritos, a jar of pickles, a package of chocolate chip cookies, and he’s been staring at a repeating DVD of Bob Dylan videos for the last two hours, unable to recollect what he actually meant to do on a Saturday afternoon. He never smokes weed again.

Statistics show he’s not alone. One Gallup poll shows that 4 out of 5 people who try marijuana do not become frequent users. The same poll also states that the percentage of Americans who even try marijuana hasn’t changed much in 30 years, rising from 33 percent to 38 percent since 1985, with just 7 percent of those polled admitting to being regular smokers.

Now, a new Boulder-based company aims to change that, introducing a marijuana-based product it says is “Cannabis 2.0” — which allows users to choose the exact cannabis experience they want, without any of the ill effects of smoking MJ flower, such as memory loss, paranoia, hunger or a heavy stoned feeling.

These side effects, the company says, is why those 4 out of 5 people who try cannabis do not become regular users.

The product is called LucidMood, and allows consumers to craft individual feelings such as “contentment” and “focus” by vaporizing the marijuana plant’s specific extracted terpenes — the plant elements (organic compounds) that give each strain of marijuana distinctive mood-enhancing effects, which are also found in other plants. The terpenes are taken in when the user vapes a little organic hemp fiber puck containing pure THC and CBD.

It’s now possible to pair a custom mood with your chosen activity of the moment … one for studying, one for skiing, for sex, one for creating art, for yoga, or for chilling out with a book. It’s a clean, clear, bright high, like vaporizing THC oil, only less stoned. Each terpene puck is labeled appropriately with  “contentment,” “focus,” “power” or other esoteric emotional states.

“This is the cannabis experience of the future,” says LucidMood inventor Charles Jones, a Boulder-based cognitive scientist and founder and CEO of Chooze Corp. “We have spent a long time experimenting with how certain aspects of cannabis blend with terpenes, which are organic compounds found in things like pine trees, mangoes and cloves.”

His research has led to a cannabis product that embraces the relationship “between plants and consciousness” that he says allows users to craft their own moods and feelings. He anticipates widespread distribution in Colorado dispensaries, as well as licensing contracts that will allow the product’s sale in other states where cannabis is legal.

– Aaron H. Bible

STONED GUINEA PIG

To see if this was bullshit or not, I eagerly set out to test its effects over a variety of my usual activities.

DATE NIGHT

Wife who never smokes vaporizes a whole puck, she’s high as shit, but not crashy or paranoid. Dinner ensues with no issues. Dip into our van for a boost of “Motivation” and stroll along Pearl Street. I solve the world’s energy crisis, wife comes up with five new business ideas. Lock keys in car but thanks to “Contentment” give zero fucks. No drowsiness but mellow, maybe too mellow. “Body Buzz” to the rescue.

WORKING ON THE COMPUTER

As a journalist who works from home, high time in front of the screen is a regular occurrence. So for this activity I chose the “Motivation” mood enhancer, duh. Worked like a charm … way better than the old bong and coffee method I’ve formerly been employing.

PLAYING MUSIC

Solid results. For those of us who normally suck at playing music, inflated confidence is an added bonus. Vape a cap of “Motivation” and you’re mother fucking Jimmy Hendrix. 

SKIING AND YOGA

Although I prefer to be sober for both yoga and skiing, for the sake of authentic journalism, I gave it the old college try. Turns out, a puck of “Contentment” was just the thing for a seven-inch, lift-served powder day at Eldora. Skip the yoga high — nobody wants to see you get that loose. 

SEX

We prefer the “Body Buzz” mood enhancing terpene to heat things up. But hell, let’s be honest, we’ve tried them all. I suggest you experiment as much as possible on your own and report back to us.