On November 8th, 2016, half of America was shit-hammered by extreme anxiety and panic when the “orangutan of destiny” known as Donald Trump became the President of the United States of America. Shock and outrage crept across the nation as people from all walks of life—including my wife at the time—broke down into tears out of complete terror. Every poll said this outcome WASN’T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN, but it did.
Sadly, to the people who had this kind of negative, life-jarring reaction, I have horrific news. Buckle your sphincters because Cheeto Jesus has a VERY REAL path to the White House in 2024, all thanks to the new “No Labels” political party that has sprung up in Colorado (along with a number of other swing states).
But, I know what you’re thinking. “Are you out of your fucking mind?! Just because Trump is leading in the polls right now, that doesn’t mean anything. Between all the indictments/jail time he’s facing and the efforts of various organizations to keep him off the ballot, there’s no way he could win the presidency again, no matter what third parties might spring up.”
First off, I do believe that if the March 4th deadline set by Judge Tanya Chutkan for the insurrection trial to begin stands firm, then there’s a high probability he’ll be imprisoned. Where I’m sure he’ll be scheming some way to convince some MAGA inmate to pick up the soap for him when it slips out of his tiny hands in the shower.
Don’t forget though, even if he is in prison, it’s still entirely legal for him to run as a legitimate candidate.
The only thing that could stop Trump’s presidential aspirations is his removal from the ballot via Section 3 of the 14th Amendment over his involvement in the January 6th insurrection. Unfortunately, it seems that most states are against exploring this option.
In Michigan, Secretary of State Jocelyn Benson (D) said she would not remove Trump from the ballot. “If we become political actors instead of election administrators, then we risk being a part of, even innocently a part of, the deterioration of democracy in our country,” she stated. She isn’t alone.
New Hampshire Secretary of State David Scanlan (R) said during a news conference that a decision by an elections official without a court ruling first could create “chaos, confusion, anger and frustration.” And Mark Graber, a University of Maryland law professor, said that “historically, courts often duck tough political questions.” He warned that courts could say “it’s too soon, this decision ought to be made by Congress, there are lots of moves courts could make.”
With all of that said, I’m glad to report that at least our home state of Colorado has grown a pair and decided to pursue legal actions that would do the right thing by removing Trump from our 2024 ballot. The good news to spring forth from this courtroom drama is that things aren’t going very well for Team Trump. The bad news comes from the fact that even if Trump loses and is off the ballot in Colorado, he still has friends in higher places.
Enter the house that the GOP built, the Supreme Court of the United States.
Though SCOTUS has declined to hear a Trump 14th Amendment case already, it’s entirely possible that if Colorado does remove Trump from the ballot, they would choose to hear that one to save his ass by keeping him on ALL ballots. And if SCOTUS opted to hear any 14th Amendment case, they’d have 130 years of legal precedent behind them to allow a legal path for Trump to run in every state.
In a Wall Street Journal piece, former attorney general Michael Mukasey argued that the 14th Amendment doesn’t apply to Trump, as it only pertains to an “officer” of government, and the president isn’t an officer of the United States because officers aren’t elected, they’re appointed. He used examples from when the term “officer” had been used this way in prior rulings (like US v. Mouat—1888), while also referencing a statement made by current Chief Justice John Roberts who said, “the people do not vote for the officers of the United States.”
So yes, Trump could very well be on the ballot in all 50 states while sitting behind bars. And while he’s sitting behind bars, the No Labels political party will be paving an orange-hued road straight to hell.
One of the things I love most about Colorado is our sense of morality and independence. Between the example I gave above about being the only state to really take a stance against Trump’s election prospects, along with the fact that as of summer this year, almost half of Colorado voters (47%) are registered as “unaffiliated,” it’s no surprise that No Labels would see the state as a fertile ground for their cause.
Since being certified by the Secretary of State in Colorado at the beginning of 2023 by submitting more than 10,000 signatures from potential supporters, No Labels has become somewhat of an underground political tour-de-force. I know that statement might seem hyperbolic but considering that it only took 15,000 votes cast for Jill Stein in Arizona during the 2016 campaign to swing the electoral college to Trump, 10-to-20,000 is quite a formidable number.
By claiming to be an organization whose mission is to support centrism and bipartisanship by using statements of being “a national movement of commonsense Americans pushing our leaders together to solve our country’s biggest problems,” in a state whose majority voting bloc are independents, they have selected the perfect target.
For unaffiliated voters like myself, this is just what the doctor ordered. I totally understand where the appeal for No Labels comes from. To be honest, though it’s clear I would never support Trump, I also find it REALLY difficult to support Biden and the DNC.
Though the Trump administration began the tariff war by imposing nearly $80 billion worth of new taxes on Americans by levying tariffs on thousands of products, the Biden administration has decided to keep the war alive by not stopping most of them. It was reported by taxfoundation.org that it cost the US an estimated 166,000 full-time jobs (all while retaining the higher taxes being held on those goods) to keep the tariffs in place. Plus, he lied to the American people when he expanded the IRS and said he wouldn’t go after the middle- and lower-classes. When the Congressional Budget Office ran the numbers, they found that at least $20 billion of the revenue Democrats were looking to collect would come from middle- and lower-class taxpayers and small businesses.
Though these are just two examples of many, I think you get the point.
Knowing these facts, it’s easy to see why someone like myself would be enticed to join such an independently-minded organization like No Labels. Of course, when you find out that the entire house of cards is built on using the independent voters of Colorado as pawns in an incredibly intricate game of electoral math whose sole purpose is to ensure a Trump presidency, the fuzzy feelings end.
The Third Way (a national think tank that champions modern center-left ideas) recently released a report revealing that No Labels chief strategist has said publicly they are preparing for a contingent election in which they try to win a few states and deny Trump and Biden 270 electoral college votes (ECVs) needed for victory. This, No Labels believes, would give them leverage to cut a deal with the House of Representatives—which is currently under Republican control.
The key slide in No Labels’ presentation shows data from eight swing states from the polling firm HarrisX. The data shows that whether a Democrat or Republican tops a No Labels ticket, Donald Trump wins—just in different ways. When a Democrat is at the top, No Labels throws seven battleground states to Trump. With a Republican leading their ticket, No Labels prevents Biden from winning any battleground outside of Pennsylvania, while Trump wins three battlegrounds and nearly reaches 270 ECVs.
Coloradoans, I get it. We are all tired of the hyper-partisan world we live in. The “either you’re with us completely, or you’re against us” attitude has worn all of us down. But as I learned in 2000 when I voted for Ralph Nader—or like my current wife realized when she voted for Jill Stein in 2016—splitting the vote to a candidate that doesn’t stand a realistic chance does nothing but allow the worst of the worst to claim victory.
I mean, between the 12 combined years of both Bush Jr. and Trump policies we’ve experienced during this century, haven’t we suffered enough?