One forgetful stoner's smoking lamp is another concerned citizen's pipe bomb. 

There's something about American culture nowadays — we expect our congressmen, police and social superiors to use big words and dance around the subject. Any straight talk might undoubtedly piss someone off, and then that could end up going viral, and then someone loses their job. And when it comes to drug use and paraphernalia, the authorities have to act like they've never been to college. 

Police were called to the downtown Boulder Transit Center at 6:01 a.m., right after a security guard called in a report of a foot-long, plastic, pipe-shaped object capped at both ends. Thinking it might be a pipe bomb, the security guard called the cops, according to police spokesperson Kim Kobel. RTD evacuated the bus station and police briefly closed a few of the streets in the area. But a Boulder police sergeant took one look at the potential pipe bomb and determined some disoriented stoner forgot his bong before boarding his bus. Poor guy. 

The police spokesman was quick to phrase the scene as delicately as possible, without ever officially calling it a bong: 

“It was some kind of either marijuana storage or marijuana smoking device. There was some marijuana in it.”

Normal bus service was quickly resumed, and the Boulder police made it through another day without having to admit they know what people actually use "water pipes" for.