Too lifted to read the news? Every week, we recap the most interesting news in the world of intoxicants, illegal or not. To inform, to liberate. …
1. Sober sexless and sad, teens are doing less drugs and having less sex than teens 10 years ago, and these straight-edge eunuch mini-humans are more depressed than their older sibs.
2. Turn on, tune in, grow your brain. DMT and LSD caused the brain cells of rats and flies to expand, branching out and connecting with one another. This could help explain psychedelics' well-documented ability to happi-fy and de-sadden.
3. Your stoned 420 ass will be safe from jail forever if liberal goddess Elizabeth Warren and actual Republican Corey Gardner can pass the STATES Act in the Senate, protecting states with legal weed from Jeff Sessions and his demon cabal. This week, the bill gained support from 12 governors, a bunch of other Senators, some conservative media and President Trump (more or less).
4. Weed loves Denver's mayor. In 2012, Michael Hancock "adamantly opposed" legalization, but today he says he's been "converted." "The sky hasn't fallen like I thought it would," Hancock said.
5. Won't somebody think of the children, as the British government confiscated the medical cannabis of a 12-year-old boy who was suffering 100 seizures a day before pot worked its planty magic. The boy seized right after the bobbies boosted his bud. The gov't later released the weed to him.
6. Families of the victims of some of the government's LSD mind control experiments in the Sixties are suing.
7. Paris joins the weed game, sort of, selling weed in "cofyshops." But it's mostly CBD weed — less than .2 percent THC.
8. Pot pros are telling budtenders to stop advising pregnant ladies to smoke cannabis, after researchers found 69 percent of Colorado pot shops were recommending weed for morning sickness. This was embarrassing.
9. Health officials called on the Trump Administration to save opioid overdose lives. Trump's lackies could use their powers to reduce the cost of narcan, the opioid antidote, from $75 a dose down to a $1 a dose.
10. One in three Americans takes a pill linked to depression. From acid reflux to blood pressure meds, 200 drugs have depression listed as one of the side effects, and people who take these drugs are, in fact, more likely to be depressed.
11. Legal psilocybin might have to wait, as it's looking like no town or state is going to vote on legalizing mushrooms in November. A Denver for Psilocybin leader told Rooster that it's unlikely to get its ballot language and signatures together in time for the fall election; the group is now likely to aim for the city election in May 2019. The measure would legalize the manufacture and possession of boomers within city limits. An attempt at getting mushies on the California ballot in November also fell short.
12. And proving that wine snobs and booze heads are pretentious assholes, a $17 cheap-ass grocery store whisky was named the best whisky in the world. Well well well, always go well.