Well, fifteen minutes of it at least. What a cliff hanger!
Who doesn't love long movies? We absolutely love them. The longer and more daunting the better, in our opinion.
Imagine then our excitement to learn that Swedish filmmaker Anders Weberg recently released his 7 hour and 20 minute long trailer for his upcoming movie Ambiancé. Pure unadulterated fucking excitement in the office.
Granted, the entire 30-day (720-hour) film doesn't come out until 2020, but this trailer has certainly piqued our interests. Weberg has made over 300 films, but this will stand as his magnum opus, and according to his website, will be the last film he ever makes. Aww.
The world record for watching films continuously is held by Ashish Sharma from India who watched 120 hours and 23 minutes worth of films in one sitting. Well, we would like to volunteer ourselves to break the record and watch all 30 days of Ambiancé in one sitting. As long as we have enough popcorn and Red Vines to last the entire time, we can do it.
Weberg will only screen the completed film once. He will play a copy of the film on each continent simultaneously. Each copy of the film will be destroyed once it is finished playing. This, according to Weberg, is because,"It’s very easy to create in a digital world. It’s harder to delete." Now that's artsy.
So what's the movie about? According to IMDB, the movie shows that "'space and time is intertwined into a surreal dream-like journey beyond places and is an abstract nonlinear narrative summary of artist Anders Weberg's time spent with the moving image." Well, we didn't get that from the trailer. So that can't be right. We watched 15 minutes of the trailer total, a minute at each half hour of the film. Here is the trailer summary at a glance.
Ambiancé Trailer Breakdown
0:00 – Movie opens with scene of rocky beach filmed in black in white. Droning sound. Credits. The letters IA in Ambiancé are red. Symbolism!?
0:30 – Still the same fucking beach. Still the same damn droning sound. Two monks on beach wearing a black and a white robe. White Robe monk is carrying a sack over his shoulder. Black Robe monk carrying bundle of sticks. White Robe puts something in bag. Oooh.
1:00 – Still the same fucking beach. Monks have switched sides of the beach. Both picking stuff up. White Robe spreads his arms and looks to the sky. Did he finally find the car keys he's been looking for!?
1:30 – Both monks are standing. Putting large sticks in the ground vertically. Are they going to build a tiki bar? That's rad. White Robe has what looks like a 2×10 piece of lumber. How did he acquire that?
2:00 – Their tiki bar or whatever is coming together nicely. About a dozen human-height sticks are standing in the ground. White Robe has rope somehow. Wow! Black Robe monk has the rope around his neck and is being pulled towards White Robe. Black Robe kinda looks like he wants to get away.
2:30 – Black Robe doesn’t appear to be tied by the neck anymore. Him and White Robe are picking some sort square of cloth off the ground. Did they make a kite? That’s cute. Wow. They hold up the cloth and it has a painting of a bull’s face on it. Maybe they’re Texas Longhorns fans? Turns not its not a kite either it's some sort of sign with posts to stick in the ground. Hmm.
3:00 – WTF…is Black Robe burying White Robe in a shallow grave? White Robe is laying on the ground surrounded and covered by stones. Black Robe picks up some stones methodically. Literally the whole beach is stones, is it really hard to chose one? Lets go Black Robe pick up the pace.
3:30 – Literally nothing happens. Black Robe is gone and White Robe is still in his shallow grave. Stupid droning music continues.
4:00 – White Robe is out of his grave. Or maybe fully buried? Its hard to tell. Black Robe is in the corner of the screen sitting hunched over holding his ears. He’s probably sick of this droning music too.
4:30 – Oh shit there is a fire in White Robe's shallow grave. White Robe doesn't appear to be in the grave. Black Robe is gone. Probably couldn’t handle the music anymore. Their weird structure still stands but theres been no progress for the past few hours.
5:00 – WTF White and Black robe are back and standing near their structure. It looks like they put socks on top of the sticks maybe to dry them or something. Maybe they are flags? The cloth on the sticks is black and white. Fire in grave has turned to smoke. White Robe spreads his arms like he's learning to ski. Black Robe grabs two of the sticks with cloth on them.
5:30 – White and Black Robe are off screen. They’ve moved all their sticks over to the left and arranged them in a teepee kinda structure. Music persists. Is this going to permanently damage my eardrums? It appears to be getting darker out. Nothing happening. At all.
6:00 – White and Black Robe are back. White Robe appears to have arranged some rocks on his 2×10 board. Black Robe walks across the screen to White Robe. He puts a white rock on Black Robe's board. In front of White Robe there are black rocks. In front of Black Robe are only white rocks. Wow! The board is set up like a teeter totter. Holy Shit! When Black Robe puts his white rock on the board the balance of the board shifts to Black Robe. Tense!
6:30 – Black Robe is standing on his side of the board. White Robe comes over with a long piece of white cloth. Where the hell did he get that? Standing behind Black Robe he puts the white cloth over Black Robe's left shoulder.
7:00 – WTF both White Robe and Black Robe are standing directly in front of the camera. Black Robe has a white clothed wrapped around…spoiler alert… HER body! Black Robe has been a chick this whole damn time! Such a twist ending! Faces are pretty blurry but it looks Black Robe is an older chick to me. Nothing is happening. They might have blood on their robe's? Or mud?
7:19 – Credits. RELEASE DATE DECEMBER 31, 2020.
And there you have it folks. The best breakdown of the world's only 7-hour movie trailer. You're welcome. Based on the trailer it seems like the film is about wearing robes and trying to make a tiki bar, getting bored, taking a nap, and weighing rocks.
Make sure you catch a screening of the full 30-day movie on one of the seven continents in 2020. You've only got one chance to see it. Don't Miss out.
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