We’ve looked into our own souls, and now yours, to decode what your psychedelic drug choice says about your personality.
Psychedelics are super fun, mildly medicinal and now come in a variety of colors, shapes and sizes for every dosing desire. There are so many keys to opening our own doors of perception, but here’s what your hallucinogenic preference says about that special snowflake of yours known as "individuality":
How it works: Shrooms grow in cow shit, last anywhere from 4-8 hours, and are the fungal gateway into the psychedelic world — taken by high schoolers, naturalists and sensory overload junkies alike.
Personality synopsis: You’re a dabbler, mildly passionate about a lot of things — be it painting nude self-portraits, watching Kubrick movie marathons, or baking red velvet cupcakes for your entire biology class; you’re all over the board. You’re pretty bad at making plans because you fear any commitment lasting longer than a box of Captain Crunch. You enjoy slow strolls and more often than not, get lost in your own neighborhood. But that’s okay, because now you’ve befriended a homeless alcoholic named Dave. Dave knows the city like the back of his liver spotted hand. He’s a big fan of your coconut borscht and your 1970s mod couch.
Why you take it: Since it’s less of a commitment than other hallucinogens, it’s an easy thing to set aside an afternoon for. You tend to take shrooms as a way of resetting, a form of meditation if you will, to dip out of the real world for a while and dip into a pool of scented colors, breathing trees, and the desire to eat fresh berries right off the bush.
Alter-ego: The rogue sorority sister. You know, the cool one that wears combat boots with a tight black dress for socials because fuck convention, but still wants networking opportunities?
How it works: Manufactured from lysergic acid — basically fungus — this mood-altering bad boy is printed on colorful sheets of paper, perforated punched, and sold by a 22-year-old called "DJ Banana Youth" out of his parents’ basement.
Personality synopsis: You probably read Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas during senior year per the recommendation of that cool, used-to-smoke-the-reefer, tail-end of-the-Beatnik-generation English teacher. You delved deeper into ‘60s counter culture, so that now you’re a guru on digging deeper into your soul just like Steve Jobs did before he had the whole Apple Computer idea. Someone already made the cup-holder fast food tray, though, so back to the drawing board, and the LSD den for you, buddy. There’s probably a copy of Be Here Now on your bedside table, or at least an incense burner somewhere in your bohemian lair. You’re okay with a little commitment — like a hamster, but not a full-blown live in girlfriend. Pink Floyd The Wall and Fight Club probably top your ‘favorite films' list.
Why you take it: Self-reflection doesn’t come easily in the sobering light of day because family issues/lack of direction/9-5 stifling your creativity, but pop one little tab with a Dark Side of the Moon album art on it and your third eye snaps wide open. You believe it’s the only way to really know yourself, so we’ll see you on the other side.
Alter-ego: Mid-fifties Grateful Dead fan reliving the wonder years with his band of bass-head brethren, except now everyone is 40 lbs heavier.
How it works: Is it a gateway to a fantastical world? To tiny elfin creatures, geometrically constructed out of sparkling jewels? Or simply, to yourself? DMT is released when you sleep, and when you die. It’s makes neurons fire when no serotonin is present so your mind is like “what the fuck is happening to meeeee.” Boom. Science.
Personality synopsis: There’s no such thing as a casual DMT user. You won’t take a hit, trip balls for twenty minutes, and head to the gym for leg day. You’re either of strong mental fortitude or a bat-shit crazy, shoeless hermit. You might view life as a grand science experiment in which there is no control and everything is the variable. You’re a brave soul if you can suit up and say yes to a drug that lets you experience the end of your life. Most of us can’t even look at our expired milk as we pour its sour chunks down the drain let alone stare into the depths of our final moments. Since you’re a pretty passionate person, you’re probably also a bit of a loner. Convincing society that their lives are infinitesimally unimportant compared to the grander landscape of the universe can be a tiring, combative endeavor. But soldier on, creative guru.
Alter-ego: A housewife who drinks way too much Chardonnay while ‘book keeping’ for her friend’s boutique. She probably got a little too friendly with the pool boy and they shared a bowl of deems, had four-dimensional sex, and never spoke of it again.
How it works: Peyote is a ‘spiritual’ drug often used in Indigenous people's religious ceremonies, or to guide one out of some sort of pervasive darkness. It affects serotonin and nerve receptors, like almost every other drug. Over the last half century, it’s been gentrified, like everything else, and now the majority just use it to see cool shit and chant stuff so they can impress their co-workers at Urban Outfitters.
Personality synopsis: You’re probably in touch with your natural surroundings, live in a tree house, or at the very least, have houseplants. You’ve definitely been to Burning Man, built mixed-media art, and danced naked under the singing moon. You love a free and cooperative working environment and will probably never have a corporate job or dental insurance. Which is totally okay because we’ll bet chewing on cactus tops helps in the oral hygiene department somehow. You believe that we can’t just be an evolutionary misstep, despite what Russ Cohle would have us think. You’re constantly searching for signs of a greater being, a higher power, a whole truth. You believe in fate, destiny, and manifestation, even if it appears in the form of the Virgin Mary on your buttered toast.
Why you use it: To get in touch with your spiritual side. Duh. Maybe conventional religion didn’t work out and you’re soul searching for a faith free from mandatory attendance, claustrophobic confessional booths and tiny hats.
Altar ego: Tony Soprano type who befriends intelligent strippers while in Vegas. Things maybe took a turn at the Waste Management plant and you just need to mourn your nephew, play roulette, and sit in the desert while high on some buttons.
How it works: You go to Peru, drink a thick, strong-ass potion brewed from a plain jungle plant, vomit and shit your brains out, then let Ayahuasca (a goddess earth mother of sorts, to each person, she’s different) take you on a journey of a lifetime.
Personality synopsis: Ayahuasca is like the doctoral candidacy school of hallucinogenic drugs. If you’ve taken it, everyone knows about it because you constantly bring it up whenever you get the chance. If this is your go to drug, you probably have 1) a lot of money to travel to South America or 2) a collection of original artwork gifted to you by a Moroccan prince. You never use Western medicine, are strongly against vaccinations, and only shop at Natural Grocers or your hydroponic tomato garden for sustenance. You’re committed to an off-the-grid lifestyle and only use your iPhone to secure a spot in your daily Vinyasa Level 3 class. You’re intense as fuck and probably a week-long juice cleanse kind of person. You’re committed to living differently, consciously, and hell bent on knowing each part of your mind, body and bowels.
Why you take it: You either take it as an adrenaline seeking, spiritually materialistic dick wanting to add another notch in your psychedelic belt. Or you take it as a way to see your whole life splayed out before you from the day you soiled your first diaper to the day you dumped in your last.
Altar ego: Naropa student with a lot of daddy’s money and a bunch of free time.
However you fuck with it, psychedelics encompass a personal journey. Be it a desire to understand fundamental laws of the universe or to just see the color red in all it’s brilliance. It’s just life man. Or is it?