Oh good god, can you even imagine?

Oh good god, can you even imagine? It’s not like anyone with half a head can walk into and then out of Target sober without spending far more than the initial intention, but to add in a few glasses of de-common sense? It’s possibly the worst … and best … idea we’ve ever heard …

In an application dated Aug 24 for what Chicago calls a “Consumption on Premises — Incidental Activity License,” it’s reported that a new Target store in the city’s Streeterville neighborhood is looking to sell alcohol to customers. That is, open containers, to freely drink, whilst shopping for home décor and other sundries. A bar inside of Target, that’s where this is all going.

The massive retail chain is following in the footsteps of other outlets offering booze to customers while they do their thing, including Taco Bell, Starbucks, Kroger and Whole Foods.

An obvious move to get customers to stay longer, thus spending more — a la Las Vegas — the chain had little to say about its application for the as-of-yet approved license, offering no further comment when asked by other reporters. Squares.

It’s hard to say whether or not the new concept will ever hit Colorado, seeing as how we only allow one spot per retail company to offer booze for take-home sale (the Target in Glendale is the only one in CO that can sell alcohol)  — though we currently have 9 Starbucks in Colorado with its “Starbucks Evenings” menu available, which includes wine and craft beer — so never say never, young boozehound.

We pity the employees having to work the customer service lines — buyer's remorse returns are going to be through the roof.