Do you have enough facial hair on your mug to scrub an airplane engine into sparkling submission? Do you love men and the occasional woman whose face is so overgrown that foresting companies are looking to invest in harvesting its lumber to build low-income housing divisions? Well, then! Bristlr is the dating app for you and your facial hair fetish.

Do you have enough facial hair on your mug to scrub an airplane engine into sparkling submission? Do you love men and the occasional woman whose face is so overgrown that foresting companies are looking to invest in harvesting its lumber to build low-income housing divisions? Well, then! Bristlr is the dating app for you and your facial hair fetish. 

On it's own, Bristlr is just another, ultra-specific dating app akin to the Ayn Rand app or the gluten free-one, but it's got a little secret up its sleeve. In addition to pointing you towards the hottest bearded men and the people who love them, Bristlr also points out creeps and publicly humiliates them with their revolutionary troll-sensing technology.

Unlike OKCupid, Tinder and their ilk, Bristlr will actually let you know when a message you’ve received is just a copy and paste form letter that your Rico Suave in question sent out en masse.

“I view it as trying to make the service subtly more open and honest,” Bristlr founder John Kershaw said. “It’s important to me to keep Bristlr’s positive and genuine vibe, and stuff like this is key to that.”

Kershaw is also working on a function that lets users rate each profile on how much time its owner puts into crafting messages.

… What?! Why have we not been doing this all along? We mean, the fact that "Molly" spent 42 hours crafting a response to our "Hey, wanna blow me" inquiry is need-to-know information.

The fledgling, beautiful app only has about 60,000 users so far, so it's practically begging you to Rogaine your face and join. Hopefully OKCupid and Tinder will develop similar functionality in the future.

But for now, before that happens, we're going to send this message to everyone we match with while we still can: