Finally, the moment we've all been waiting for is here: scientists have conducted their annual classification of global penis size, and have published their results for us all to see/ cry about.

Finally, the moment we've all been waiting for is here: scientists have conducted their annual classification of global penis size, and have published their results for us all to see/ cry about.

The study, published in BJU International, has revealed the following revelations:

With an average length of 7.1 inches rock hard, the Democratic Republic of Congo rules the world in dick size.

South America, however, is the most well-hung mainland. The more southerly Americas have an average cock presence of 6.36 inches.

Now; let's talk about you and your blazing American eagle of a cock.

Americans didn't even break the Top 50 countries with the largest penises. In fact, with an average length of 5.1 inches at attention, we came in 61st out of 80 countries measured in the study. And if that's not enough to deflate your boner, the American wang is 0.4 inches shorter than the global average, which is 5.5 inches of veiny fun.

You know who has the smallest chodes in all the land?

NORTH KOREA. At an average erect length of 3.8 inches, Kim Jong Un's clan is so small, you need binoculars to get at those spicy weiners.

Damn. If penises are analogous to baby arms … North Korea's are still zygotic.

Some other important findings:

– The correct approach to gage dick size is to measure from tip of the penis to the base of the pubic bone with measuring tape.

– Only 3 percent of men worldwide are more than 8 inches. Just 6 percent of men really require additional huge condoms.

Naturally, this important and scientifically titillating study has re-awakened people's interest in the question, "Does size matter?" Many penis aficionados debate this query, however a new infographic from Best Infographics has revealed that size does matter. Very much so, in fact. 

According to this anatomically correct graph, 61 percent of people have refused to have sex with someone because their penis was too small, while 57 percent of humanoids agree that bigger really is better. However, 10 percent of people seem to think it's the "motion of the ocean" that matters, so for all you Americans and North Koreans out there, there's an ever-so-slight glimmer of hope in this tiny penis world for you.